Storyline: The swinging sailor swigs and sways to his own compulsively seductive beat, while serving as unsteady ballast for his more conventional first mate’s attempts at making a seaworthy vessel of their combined ventures together.

Desi Arnaz (Desiderio Alberto Arnaz y de Acha) (1917-1986) - Cuban/American bandleader and actor. Outer: Parents were wealthy Cuban landowners, only son. Father was mayor of Santiago, Cuba, a position his grandfather had received by appointment from the queen of Spain. His maternal grandfather was a founder of Bacardi rum. The revolution of 1933, however, saw his home and family possessions burned and his progenitor jailed. Came to America with his father at 16 as a poor refugee, and worked cleaning bird cages as his first job, as well as selling everything from tiles to bananas in order to bring his mother over, while living in a warehouse. 5’11 1/2”, handsome and charming. Joined a Cuban combo, more for the money than a desire to be a performer, then worked for Xavier Cugat, before forming his own band, which became a huge success, after he introduced the conga. Became a popular entertainer, playing the bongos and singing. Led a fast and loose show business life, drinking and carousing, often with many women at once. Made his film debut in his early 20s, in the aptly titled Too Many Girls, a reprise of a Broadway show he was in, and met and married Lucille Ball in 1940, who was his co-star. Had a hit tune in 1946, playing his bongos bare-chested and singing ‘Babalu.’ Despite their separate successes, their marriage was strained by his excessive lifestyle, and when Ball was approached to do a TV sitcom, she insisted her husband be part of it to shore up the marriage, despite misgivings on the network’s part about an Hispanic lead. The team created "I Love Lucy," in which he played performer Ricky Ricardo, mangling English and working as a perfect foil for his wife’s antics, while proving prescient behind the scenes by filming it in front of a live audience, to preserve it . The show was a huge hit in the 1950s, and has remained constantly in syndication afterwards as an emblem of the best of that era’s sitcoms, thanks to his production values and input. 2 children from union, son Desi, Jr. became a rock’n’roller, while daughter Lucie became an actress. Both children were incorporated into the show’s storyline. Created Desilu Productions, which went on to become one of the largest TV concerns, controlling the same RKO studios where both had once worked. His excessive philandering finally ended the marriage 2 decades after it began. Sold out his interests in Desilu, and focused on business afterwards, hosting a drama series, "Desilu Playhouse," while producing several successful TV series. Remarried, and did occasional bit parts on sitcoms. Eventually succumbed to lung cancer, dying in his daughter’s arms. Inner: Great charm, good sense of humor, whole lot funnier than his wife in real life. Struggle between playboy side, business side and a genuine enjoyment of performing. Skilled producer, with an instinct for quality, as well as getting all the details right. Bongo-beating lifetime of being part of America’s most beloved TV couple, while wrestling with his own destructive demons, and ultimately allowing them to get the better of his beat. John Drew, Sr. (1827-1862) - Irish/American actor. Outer: Father was an artisan. Brother was also an actor. Worked as a seaman, but jumped ship in Liverpool at 15, then came to America in his teens, and made his stage debut before he was 20, originally working with his brother. Short and slender. Married comic actress Louisa Lane (Lucille Ball) in 1850, 3 children from union, 2 of whom went on to careers on the stage, Georgina (Jane Seymour), who married into the Barrymore family, and John, Jr. (Raul Julia). Along with another actor, he assumed management of the Arch Street Theatre in Philadelphia in his mid-20s. Toured widely, going to England and Ireland on one trip, California and Australia 2 years later, and Australia and England, in an unconscious circle, before coming home to die of brain congestion. Inner: Natural performer, good Irish impressionist, good sense of humor, life of the party. Peripatetic lifetime of serving as a moving anchor for his acting family, before jumping ship early to return as an even more self-destructive character with the same first mate. Felipe V (1683-1746) - King of Spain. Outer: Grandson of Louis XIV (Charles de Gaulle) of France. Son of the Dauphin of France, mother was the daughter of the elector of Bavaria. Married in proxy at 5 to Maria Luisa, the daughter of the King of Sardinia, ultimately 4 sons from union, including his successor, Luis I (Raul Julia). Held the title of duc d’Anjou, before accepting the Spanish crown at the age of 17, where he began the Bourbon line on that throne, allowing his French background to color both his court and rule. Spoke no Spanish at the time, having been raised in France, which he was never to see again upon leaving to assume his throne in 1701. Reasonably attractive, and highly sexed, but weighted down by Catholic scruples, confining his satiation to marriage. Kept his wife by his side night and day, so that their bodily functions were in accord, even timing their bowel releases together, while they often received courtiers seated on a double commode. Every separation from her was cause for anxiety, but his demands wore her out and she died at 25. Married his cousin Isabella Farnese (Lucille Ball), an extremely capable and domineering woman, who quickly came to control him, 7 more children from union, including Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher), and Felipe, Duke of Parma (Wallace Shawn). Since his grandfather had not ruled him out, he harbored a desire for the French throne, which created the War of the Spanish Succession, that ultimately stripped him of numerous of his possessions. Thanks to his 2nd wife’s ambitions for her sons, he was also embroiled in other territorial conflicts. Had few friends, and his primary interests were religion, hunting and music, while his Italian and French advisers made some headway in economic reforms. Abdicated in favor of his first son, Luis, then resumed the throne when the latter died of smallpox after only 7 months of rule. Lapsed into periods of senility towards the end of his reign, wandering around wearing old clothes, while his wife controlled state affairs, although she also may have simply acted as his voice. Died of apoplexy. Inner: Highly sexed, indolent and melancholic with a deep sense of religiosity, but also clear-minded and determined when he had to be. Corseted lifetime of feeling the constraints of his own emotions, which paralyzed him, placing him on a performance path in order to give true uninhibited expression to the party animal that lay beneath his royal veneer. Guy de Lusignan (c1129-1194) - French king of Jerusalem. Outer: Son of the count of Lusignan, who had been a crusader, and brother of Amalric (Walt Disney). Along with his brothers, he ambushed and killed an English earl on his way back from pilgrimage, and wound up banished. Ultimately made his way to Jerusalem sometime in his 40s, after Amalric had married into the nobility there. A handsome lady’s man, with no experience in anything but the art of flattery, he was chosen as husband by Sybilla (Lucille Ball), the widow of the rightful claimant to the throne of the Latin Kingdom of Jerusalem, and the duo were married at Eastertide in 1180. Given two counties to rule, Ascalon and Jaffa, he was known as the Count of Jaffa afterwards. His wife doted on him, although his predecessor Baldwin IV (Benicio Del Toro), who was dying of leprosy, was determined that he would not succeed him, and tried unsuccessfully to annul the marriage. Nevertheless, he had powerful protectors, although he was disinherited in favor of his wife’s son from her first marriage, Baldwin V (Raoul Julia), and took his vengeance out on some poor shepherds. In 1186, Baldwin V died, possibly as the result of poison. Sibylla became queen, divorced Guy and then renamed and remarried him, two daughters from union. When she was crowned, she promptly handed it to her husband, who crowned himself, although the move caused much grumbling among his barons. He subsequently proved no match for the Saracen sultan, Saladin (David Sarnoff) who defeated and captured him at the Battle Of Hattin, along with the army of Jerusalem, and he was imprisoned in Damascus. Jerusalem fell shortly afterwards, ending the kingdom, so that he held an empty throne. Released a year later, through his wife’s pleading, and the two went to Tyre, the singular citadel still in Christian hands, although they were denied entrance. Spent two years trying to besiege Acre, during which time both his wife and daughters died of an epidemic, and he lost the crown to his sister-in-law. Left Acre with a small fleet, and got the support of Richard the Lionheart (Richard Burton) and his fellow Third Crusaders, who successfully brought the contest for the throne to conclusion, by giving it to his brother-in-law Conrad. Relinquished all claims to the title in 1192, in exchange for sovereignty over the island of Cyprus, after helping capture its main fortress, and purchasing it from the Templars. He was allowed, however, only to hold the title for the length of his life and could not pass it on. Continued to serve Richard while still quarreling over his kingship with his brother-in-law. The dispute was finally ended when the latter was killed by hired assassins, whose sponsor remained a mystery. Died two years later, and was succeeded in Cyprus by his brother Amalric II (Walt Disney). Inner: Sensualist and charming. Easily influenced, hot-headed and grasping. End of the line lifetime of having his larger will continually thwarted, so that his need for rule was not yet sated, nor had he yet exhausted the aphrodisiac of power.


Storyline: The madcap matriarch allows her ongoing partner to act out her repressed wildness, while she continues to take care of business for the both of them, as an upright, out-there reflection of the buffoonery of ordinary life.

Lucille Ball (Lucille Desiree Ball) (1911-1989) - American actress and comedienne. Outer: Mother was a pianist, father was a telephone lineman who died when she was 3. Took music lessons from the former and began her show business career at 15, by going to Manhattan to study drama with a well-known teacher there. Unable to make the chorus line on Broadway, she worked at odd jobs to support herself, including modeling. 5’7 1/2”, and large-eyed. A car accident confined her to a wheelchair for 2 years, then she went back to modeling. Became the Chesterfield Cigarette Girl, which landed her a Goldwyn Girl job at 21 in Roman Scandals. Began her motion picture career in bit parts and supporting roles. Originally a dyed blonde, she eventually became a distinctive red head in the 1940s, which made her a good comic foil. Able to establish herself as a female clown, often playing off of seasoned funnymen, Bob Hope and Red Skelton, although she never quite achieved the stardom in films that she wished. Married Cuban bandleader Desi Arnaz at 30, but the pressures of being on the road and his excesses and unfaithfulness made the union shaky. Filed for divorce 4 years into the marriage, but then gave her husband one more chance. Began her own radio show in 1946, “My Favorite Husband,” and wanted to make the switch to TV, but also wished to work with Arnaz to strengthen the marriage. Together they created the sitcom, "I Love Lucy," in 1951, one of the great successes in early TV, in which they played projections of themselves, he as a Cuban bandleader, Ricky Ricardo, and she as his showbiz obsessed wife, Lucy. Despite the fears of the network over a Hispanic male lead, America loved Lucy and Ricky. The show had a 7 year run, and then immortality in nonstop re-release over the decades. Incorporated the birth of their son into the show’s ongoing storyline, 2 children from union, son Desi became a rock’n’roller, and daughter Lucie an actress. Their production company, Desilu Productions, went on to become one of the largest TV concerns, controlling the same RKO studios where both had once worked. Continued her role as TV’s favorite redhead in a series of specials and sitcoms, although her marriage finally fell apart. Filed for divorce the day after filming the show’s final episode, in 1960, and Arnaz sold his share in their company to her. Did one Broadway stint, then became president of Desilu and quite wealthy, eventually selling the company to a large corporation. At 50, she married nightclub comedian Gary Morton, who gave her the stability that Desi never did, although she remained in love with the latter. Did "The Lucy Show," for 7 seasons in the 1960s, and then followed it up with ‘Here’s Lucy,’ for another 7 seasons, before one final season in her mid-70s of "Life with Lucy," although she found that doing a repeat of her early successes was no fun. Without Desi Arnaz, she showed herself more interested in saving money than paying attention to the details of production, as each incarnation of her show became more and more tepid and unwatchable. Her end-life saw her embittered over problems of aging and having already had her moment of glory. Died of a ruptured aorta after heart surgery. Inner: Driven, ambitious, far more serious in her pursuit of performance excellence than her clowning would indicate, with little real sense of humor. Flame for fame lifetime of winning the hearts of a nation, but having a great deal more trouble in reining in the troubled heart of her one true love. Mrs. John Drew (Louisa Lane) (1818-1897) - English/American actress. Outer: Both parents were actors, onstage as a wee babe. Her father died when she was 5, and she emigrated to the U.S. with her mother, making her American debut at 7, becoming a child star almost immediately. Her mother remarried a theater manager and at 11, she went with the family to Jamaica, where her stepfather and baby half-sister died. She, her mother, and her 2 year old step-sister returned to the U.S. the following year. Began doing more adult parts at 12. When she was 16, she married a singer and actor of 40. The duo divorced 11 years later, while touring as a leading lady with her mother and half-sibling throughout the country with leading actors. Played male roles, as was the custom of the time, also sang opera and operetta and danced, but was best known as a comic actress. At 28, she married an actor who specialized in Irish roles, but he died the following year. At 30, she married Irish actor John Drew (Desi Arnaz), and was professionally known by his name thereafter. 3 children, two of whom had careers on the stage, Georgina (Jane Seymour), who married into the Barrymore clan, and John, Jr. (Raul Julia). Also adopted the daughter of a half-sister, who went on to her own unmemorable career, before dying relatively young. In addition, adopted Sidney Drew (Wallace Shawn), who played in vaudeville and films. Her husband died from brain congestion, 14 years after they married. Took over the management of their Philadelphia theater, re-christening it Mrs. John Drew’s Arch Street Theatre, where she revived comic classics, and did contemporary American plays. Also toured for 11 seasons, and continued appearing on stage until the time of her death. A top performer and manager for 4 decades, she was respected by all who worked with her. Spent her last 5 years on her memoirs. Inner: Witty, blunt, honest, energetic, humble and hard-working. Prudish, and a Victorian taskmaster with both children and acting company alike. Archly theatrical lifetime of centering her existence around the theater and performing, while serving as a teacher for an extended brood of children, eager to learn the ways of the stage from a master, who had not yet mastered her own sense of life beyond the boards. Isabella Farnese (1692-1766) - Spanish queen. Outer: Father was a prince of Parma, mother was the sister-in-law of imbecilic Spanish king Carlos II (Benicio Del Toro), royal upbringing. Brought up and educated in strict seclusion by her mother, although it failed to temper her lively and ambitious temperament. Pock-marked but attractive, athletic and passionately fond of music. In her early 20s, she became the 2nd wife of Felipe V (Desi Arnaz), grandson of Carlos, and soon came to dominate his affairs. When he emerged from her bedchamber following their wedding night, he announced he was her ‘slave for life.’ 7 children from union, including Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher), and Felipe, Duke of Parma (Wallace Shawn), although her husband’s older sons stood in the way of their succession. Immediately made her power felt by banishing her predecessor-in-influence, a royal princess, on their first enflamed meeting, when she shouted to her guard, “Arrest this mad woman,” and sent her packing. Vigorously went after ancient Italian possessions of Spain, to the point of placing herself at the head of one division of the Spanish army, although the European powers thwarted her larger aims. Tried to secure Italian thrones for her sons, which brought Spain into war with several mighty nations. Able to choose ministers who advanced her schemes, as well as made useful economic, administrative and military reforms. After the death of her husband in 1746, and the ascendency of her stepson Ferdinand VI, her influence waned, and she spent much of the last 2 decades away from the court, but lived long enough to see her oldest and most accomplished son, Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher), ultimately succeed him. Inner: Strong-willed, keen political sense, highly ambitious for herself and her progeny. Muscle-flexing lifetime of being allowed to test her will against whole countries, and ultimately prevailing, through the auspices of her longtime mate. Sibylla, Countess of Jaffa and Ascalon (1160-1190) - Latin kingdom of Jerusalem queen. Outer: Of French descent. Eldest daughter of Amalric I (Harold Alexander), king of Jerusalem, mother was Agnes of Courtney (Mary Pickford). Older sister of Baldwin IV (Benecio Del Toro). Raised by her great aunt, who was an abbess, she was given a Catholic education, although she showed herself to be quite free-spirited. Her marriage was of extreme concern, since her brother’s infirmity precluded a long run on the throne. Given her mother’s title of Countess of Jaffa and Ascalon, as a signpost of future royal heirs. Her father sent a legation in search of an appropriate suitor, although the first choice rejected her for unknown reasons and returned to France. After her father’s death, her brother and his regent married her to the son of a marquis, and a military adept, but he died of malaria when she 3 months pregnant, leaving the succession of the kingdom once more in doubt. Had a son, Baldwin V (Raoul Julia) who was sickly his entire short life. While a suitable mate was searched for among the courts of Europe, she chose Guy de Lusignan (Desi Arnaz), a handsome charmer, with little else to recommend him. Reluctantly, Baldwin IV agreed to the match, giving him two counties to rule, and the two were wed at Eastertide in 1180, although the king tried to get the union annulled. Two daughters from the marriage. When her brother died, her husband was disinherited, and in his stead, her son Baldwin V was crowned, but, he died soon after, leaving the barons of Jerusalem no choice but to crown her. Immediately afterwards, she placed the crown on her husband’s head and declared him king in 1186. Able to manipulate alliances to her advantage, over factions that opposed her, but her husband’s whole army was overwhelmed at the Battle of Hattin the following year, and he was captured, while Jerusalem fell, ending the kingdom, and initiating the Third Crusade. Allowed to escape with her daughters, to Tripoli. Pleaded with the sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff) for her husband’s release, and it was granted, and the two fled to Tyre, the singular city still in Christian hands, although they were denied entrance. Died during an epidemic, along with their daughters, while her husband was trying to lay seige to Acre. Inner: Impetuous and headstrong, although once in power, evinced a cleverness and cunning in dealing with opposing forces. Power-mongering lifetime of making her will known at a time when women had little power of their own, despite not living long enough to see the consequences of her actions.


Storyline: The big-hearted healer tries to make the planet a better place for his having been on it, but cannot quite get past his own sense of interior decay, despite a nourishing vitality and a need to energize others.

Raul Julia (Raul Rafael Carlos Julia y Arcelay) (1940-1994) - Puerto Rican/American actor. Outer: Father was a successful Puerto Rican restauranteur who introduced pizza to the island. Mother was a non-professional singer. 2 sisters, warm, close family. His parents took stray children into their home to feed them. At 5, he played the devil in a school play and knew he would be an actor. Educated at the Univ. of Puerto Rico, then came to the mainland in his mid-20s, where he received stage training. Made his NY debut in a Spanish language play, and his first appearance in English 2 years later at the Shakespeare Festival. Established himself as an eminent modern Shakespearean, starring in Macbeth, Hamlet and The Taming of the Shrew with Meryl Streep. 6’2”, darkly handsome, with lidded eyes, he became one of the first Puerto Ricans to launch a successful Broadway career before entering films in his early 30s, initially with smaller parts, to equally strong effect, although he much preferred the stage. In 1965, he married Magda Vasallo, a dancer, 2 sons from union, divorced 4 years later. Also did a TV miniseries, and spent one season with ‘Sesame Street’ as Rafael the Fixit Man. Won a Tony Award for assaying Macheath in The Threepenny Opera, a role he would repeat on the screen. Married actress Merel Poloway in 1976. Capable of both the heroic and the villainous, he is best remembered for his comic turn as Gomez in the ghoulish The Addams Family, as well as the convicted political terrorist Valentin in Kiss of the Spider Woman. For the last 15 years of his life, he was actively involved in the Hunger Project, and also worked with the Hispanic Organization of Latin Actors to develop theater in Spanish. His last role was as Brazilian rain-forest activist Chico Mendes, for which he got sick and had to be airlifted out of the Mexican jungle. Battled cancer, then had a stroke a few months later, slipped into a coma and died. Given a state funeral in Puerto Rico. Inner: Irrepressibly charming, passionate, compassionate, deeply committed to his craft. Warm, modest, real. Open-hearted lifetime of bringing his own rich brand of humanity to the stage and screen, while doing battle with his as yet unintegrated interior, in an otherwise good will go-round dedicated to all-around upliftment. John Drew, Jr. (1853-1927) - American actor. Outer: Mother was actress Louisa Lane Drew (Lucille Ball) and father was Irish actor, John Drew, Sr (Desi Arnaz). Youngest of 3, his other siblings both had stage careers, including Georgina (Jane Seymour), who married into the Barrymore family. Sent to boarding schools, where he was a good athlete, while evincing no interest in acting as a youth. First appeared in his mother’s Arch Street Theater at 19, but took his initial stage outing so lightly, his mother was annoyed. Medium height, strong features with heavily-lidded eyes. A casual actor, although there was great study behind his ease, and he served as a bridge figure between the old and new styles of emoting. Made his NY debut 2 years later in a comedy, under Augustin Daly (Aaron Spelling). Continued his association with the producer, enjoying his first big success in his mid-20s. Married at 23 to the daughter of an actress and a friend of his mother’s, one child from union. After 13 years, he left Daly to join Charles Frohman’s (Harvey Weinstein) company, where he stayed for 20 years. After Frohman’s death on the sinking of the Lusitania, his career began to sink as well. Beloved by his fellow players, he was chosen lifetime president of the Players’ club, an honor given to only 2 actors, Edwin Booth (Montgomery Clift) and Joseph Jefferson III (Jimmy Stewart). Refused to enter the film industry. In great physical pain at life’s end, he was rushed to San Francisco to have his teeth extracted, which were poisoning him, and died. Wrote his memoirs, My Years on the Stage. Inner: Highly social, popular, charming, with an innate acting intelligence. Poisoned, once again, by his interior, despite a seemingly highly integrated character. Open-hearted lifetime of bringing a studied casualness and lack of affectation to the stage, while earning the love of virtually everyone whose life he touched, except maybe his own. Luis I (1707-1724) - Spanish king. Outer: Eldest son of Felipe V (Desi Arnaz), mother was the daughter of the king of Sardinia. In 1722, he married Louise Elizabeth, the daughter of Philippe II (Boris Yeltsin), the duke of Orleans and regent of France. Multi-lingual and multi-talented, with all the attributes of an exemplary king, had he lived long enough to rule. His wife, however, was to-an-early-grave partner, and the marriage was probably never consummated, as she ignored him in favor of stuffing her stout form and scandalizing the court with her sulky, peevish ways. Ascended the throne in 1724, when his father abdicated in favor of him but ruled for only 7 months, before succumbing to smallpox, at which point his father re-ascended the throne, and his wife was hustled back to the French court. Inner: Intelligent, accomplished and full of potential. Flickering candle lifetime of not being allowed a memorable run on the throne through the ongoing problem of a body not quite in accord with the immense talent within it. Baldwin V (1177-1186) - French king of Jerusalem. Mother was the sister of his predecessor Baldwin IV (Benecio Del Toro), father was a French noble. A sickly child, he inherited the throne after his uncle died from leprosy in 1185. During his brief reign a French knight acted as regent and he was able to obtain a much-needed truce with the Saracen sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff). Died soon after and was succeeded by his mother’s second husband, Guy de Lusignan (Desi Arnaz), who may have had him poisoned. Inner: In delicate health his entire brief life. Cup-of-coffee lifetime of briefly tasting rule, before succumbing to the poison of power, as he would continue to do in one form or another, every time he mounted a throne in the company of his longtime family.


Storyline: The caricature-turned-consummate character actor compulsively goes for craft and detailed, nuanced performance after a cartoonish go-round of doing the exact opposite, and winding up in a coffined career as a result, after many a go-round of playing the holy ruling fool.

Benicio del Toro (1967) - Puerto Rican actor and producer. Outer: Both parents were attorneys, although his mother stayed home to raise her two sons, while encouraging his artistic side. She died from hepatitis when he was 9, and he began acting out his anger, getting into continual trouble, particularly after his begetter remarried only a year after her demise. His father’s strong sense of discipline helped, as did being sent to boarding school in Pennsylvania, while making the cultural transition, despite a strong sense of alienation. Began acting in school plays at UC San Diego, and found his vocation, then moved to NYC, and studied at the Circle in the Square Acting School, before winning a scholarship to learn method acting with Stella Adler, despite his sire’s objections to his choice of careers. Moved to Los Angeles, while lying to his father about what he was doing, and continued his studies, while receiving money from him. The duo did not speak to one another for 6 months after he revealed his duplicity. 6’2”. Began getting TV roles, before breaking into films, in 1988 in Big Top Pee-Wee, playing Duke the Dog-Faced Boy. Portrayed a memorable illiterate dealer in a TV miniseries, “Drug Wars,” and then continued his film work, most notably with The Usual Suspects in 1995, which won him an Independent Spirit Award for Best Actor, thanks to his mumbling performance. Extremely detail-oriented in his preparation for roles, often driving directors crazy with his need for authenticity, but he is able to combine his unusual physical presence with a unique gift for characterization. Won an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor, as well as a Golden Globe and SAG award as an uncorrupt Mexican border officer in Traffic in 2001, and became an extremely hot Hollywood property afterwards, determined not to repeat his addictive mistakes of yore. Won several Spanish-language awards for his depiction of revolutionary Che Guevara in Che, although no Hollywood accolades for it. Despite being linked with several actresses, he has a strong need for solitude. Returned to his crypto-horror roots in 2010 as The Wolfman, which he also co-produced, without knowing he had appeared in the 1941 original as a character named after himself, Bela, who passes on his lycanthropy via biting the hero, Lawrence Talbot, played by Lon Chaney, Jr. (Kellan Lutz). Had a daughter with Kimberly Stewart, daughter of rocker Rod, in 2011, despite disavowing coupledom with her. Inner: Intense, extremely focused, obsessed with detail and determined not to make the same mistakes as his previous go-round. His relationship with his father is central to his life, as he continues to seek his approval, having finally won it for his work. Resurrected lifetime of going for craft, rather than cartoonish performance, in an effort to expand his unusual screen persona, as well as his reflective life around it. Bela Lugosi (Bela Blasko) (1882-1956) - Hungarian/American actor. Outer: Father was a Hungarian baker trained banker. Following his sire’s death, he trained as an ironworker, before turning to his true love of performing. 6’1”, 178 lbs. Trained for the stage at the Budapest Academy of Theatrical Arts, and began his stage career at the turn of the century. Entered films in 1915, occasionally working under the name of Arisztid Olt. Because he was active in politics and union work after the collapse of the Austro-Hungarian Empire following WW I, he was forced to flee to Germany the following year, and made the transition to German films, before emigrating to the U.S. in 1921, where he played character parts on both the stage and screen, with his heavy middle-European accent. Scored his most memorable success on stage as “Dracula,” which he played for a year on Broadway, and then on the road for another 2 years, and it would be the role with which he would become permanently identified, much to the detriment of his craft, which was limited at best. The film version in 1931 would cement him as a horror icon, and he could never get past the pigeonholing, becoming a mainstay of that grim genre during the 1930s and 1940s. Completely indiscriminate about the parts he chose, which were usually about one-dimensional evil personified, while he accepted, for publicity sake, the image of the vampire, giving interviews in coffins, and ultimately becoming a parody of himself. Married and divorced 5 times, to Ilona Szmik twixt 1917 and 1920, to Ilona von Montagh between 1921 and 1924, and 1924, to society woman Beatrice Weeks for all of three days, thanks to his affair with actress Clara Bow (Courtney Love). His singular long-lasting match was to Lillian Arch, from 1933 to 1953, which produced his only offspring, a son of the same name. His final union was to Hope Lininger, the year before he died. Also became a morphine addict, eventually committing himself to a hospital, while continually suffering money woes, thanks to his compulsive need to be wed. Tried to resurrect his career with the inept Ed Wood, and died during the production of his final film, Plan 9 From Outer Space, which has generally been regarded as the worst movie ever made, a fitting epitaph for his career. Died of a heart attack, and was buried in his Dracula cape. Inner: Indiscriminate, highly addictive and continual prey to his own weaknesses. Undead lifetime of sacrificing career and reputation for easy success, only to be buried alive by his addictions and his propensity for attracting female vampires into his wedding bowers. Carlos II (1661-1700) - Spanish king. Known as Carlos the Mad. Outer: Of Hapsburg descent. Father was Felipe IV (Walt Disney), mother was Maria Anna (Annette Funicello), the niece of the king. Youngest and only surviving of 3 sons of the incestuous union. Never expected to live. Had an enormously misshapen head, and the misshapen jaw of his family line, which made eating extremely difficult, so that he swallowed things whole and then regurgitated them. Often drooled, and had an intellect that matched his features. Inherited the throne at the age of 4, and his mother served as regent for the first decade of his reign. Fed by wet nurses until he was 5 or 6, and was not allowed to walk until almost fully grown. At 18, he was married to Marie Louise, the lively niece of Louis XIV (Charles de Gaulle), although the union was never consummated, thanks to an impotency that went along with his other sterling characteristics. Would often drool over women at court and molest them, although he had a sense of his role, and Spain’s political place in Europe’s conflicts, while occasionally evincing the acumen of his ancestors, in between his normally dulled state. His wife died a decade into their marriage and in 1689, he married Maria Anna, a German princess, although the second union was also unconsummated. Felt he was demonized, and underwent exorcism rites to little avail. Towards his life’s end he had the coffins of his ancestors opened so that he could look upon their decaying bodies, and the sight of his first wife caused him undying grief. Desperately wanted to avoid the diminishment of his Spanish possessions, but failed to do so. At his death from a fever, he was in an advanced state of decay, and since he left no bloodline, he appointed a Bourbon as his successor, which occasioned the War of the Spanish Succession. That conflict embroiled most of Europe over the next 14 years, and ultimately resulted in the French-born Felipe V (Desi Arnaz) succeeding him. Inner: Obstinate, stubborn and pious. Oversexed but undermanned. Drooling lifetime of giving end of the line personification to an inbred family, in an ignominious testimony to the incestuousness of royal rule. Baldwin IV (1161-1185) - Latin king of Jerusalem. Known as “Baldwin the Leper.” Outer: Of French descent. Father was Amalric I (Harold Alexander), the king of Jerusalem, mother was his first wife. Stammered like his sire and around the age of 9, he began showing signs of leprosy. Educated by a church archdeacon, he was crowned four days after his father died in 1174. Had a regent until he was 16, although his delicate condition required others periodically to stand in his stead, and he served as an illusion, since his court never mentioned his disease. His forces were able to stand off the Saracen sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff) and prevent him from sieging one of his cities, although that martial adept was later able to encircle Jerusalem. His body reflected his kingdom, whose nobility was leprous in its feelings for one another, so that he was an embodiment of a rapidly weakening state. After his sister Sibylla (Lucille Ball) married Guy de Lusignan (Desi Arnaz), he made him regent during his periods of incapacity, only to see how untrustworthy he was, and became determined that the latter not succeed him, but ultimately was thwarted after his death in that desire. His face and features became unrecognizable from his disease, and towards the end, he could only speak in halting whispers, while being carried on a litter, although he showed himself to be unafraid of death. Crowned his sickly young nephew, Baldwin V (Raoul Julia), but he died within the year, after possibly being poisoned by Guy. Inner: Kind, solicitous, and highly intelligent. Leprous lifetime of inhabiting a rapidly melting body, as yet another experiment in outlandish experience that would wind up marking all his lives of rule in concert with his longtime karmic family.


Storyline: The paramount poohbah proves himself a commercial adept, no matter his realm, while finding his real métier in the magical kingdom of Hollywood, where his sense of innovation and mass tastes made him a true founding father of that unique colossus of dreams, before returning, appropriately as one of its famous players.
Ashton Kutcher (Christopher Ashton Kutcher) (1978) - American actor and producer. Outer: Of Irish-American descent, with a touch of Bohemia in his ancestry. Parents were both factory workers. One older sister and a fraternal twin brother, who was born with cardiomyopathy, a heart condition, while he has two toes that are fused together, making him a partial webfoot. Had an outdoorsy, working-class upbringing, doing odd jobs, and wresting and playing wide receiver on his high school football team, while also appearing in school productions. Deeply disturbed about his twin’s condition, which drove him to contemplate suicide, while tensions at home led to his parents divorcing when he was in his teens. His brother may be an alternate manifestation of himself, isolating his frailties and weaknesses for him to see from afar, rather than from inside. His tremendous anger over his beginnings led him to break into his high school with a cousin during his senior year to rob it, only to be caught red-handed while leaving afterwards. Sentenced to three years’ probation and community service, the incident served to expel his rage with the rejection he experienced in its aftermath, as well as his loss of potential scholarships. 6’2”, lean and handsome. Much chastened, he attended the Univ. of Iowa, where he majored in biochemical engineering, in a desire to find some sort of cure for his brother’s condition. A hard-partying frat boy, with a strong self-destructive bent while at school, he supported himself working summers, before forgoing college for a possible modeling and acting career, after winning a contest for the former in NYC. Signed with a NY agency and immediately began doing European catwalk work as well as appearing in several high profile ads, before moving to Los Angeles. Immediately won a spot in 1998 as doofus Michael Kelso, on the TV series “That ‘70’s Show,” for its multiyear run. Followed that up with several successful comedy roles after the turn of the century, including the seminal slacker classic, Dude, Where’s My Car? Showed a good instinct for choosing roles that allowed his easy charm to shine through, while also balancing off his acting with his innate business sense. In 2003, he produced and starred in MTV’s “Punk’d,” a paean to practical jokes, before becoming executive producer on several reality TV shows, through his production company, Katalyst Films, which he runs with a partner. Also part of the management team as a creative director for Ooma, a voice over Internet business. In 2005, he married actress Demi Moore, some 15 years his senior, and through the union he became a Kabbalist, a mystical Jewish practice she follows, replete with red string on his wrist to symbolize his sense of growth and change. Close to her three daughters from her marriage to actor Bruce Willis, and very much into being a father. Despite the ease with which he assays comic roles, he also has the desire to expand as an actor, into more dramatic and action-oriented fare. In 2008, he also added assistant high school football coach to his c.v., overseeing the freshman squad of an L.A. high school. Became involved with his wife in fighting child sex trafficking, by creating an interactive video campaign, “Real Men Don’t Buy Girls,” through their mutual foundation. Chosen to replace the volatile Charlie Sheen on the popular sit-com “Two and A Half Men,” in 2011, after the former was fired, and had a spectacular debut, before the show settled into lesser demographics. At the same time, an extra-marital dalliance summarily ended his six year marriage when his wife sadly sued him for divorce at year’s end. Some ill-advised tweets also brought monitoring over his electronic issuances by his management team, making him a cautionary figure of an age where there are no longer boundaries between the public and private lives of its compulsively twittery luminaries.Took up with actress Mila Kunis and got dumped as longtime spokesman for Nikon cameras for demanding double his multi-million salary, in a display of greed underlying his true grasping character. One daughter from the union with the former prior to getting married, which he finally admitted to in 2015, after earlier being coy about his marital status. Added a son to their family the following annum. Has a net worth of $140 million. Inner: Highly social and extremely ambitious, with a sure-handed touch for what the public wants, as residue from his previous go-round in this series. Remains a pennypincher from his upbringing, despite his overt financial success. Seamless transition lifetime of stepping out from deep behind the camera to directly in front of it, to good effect, while trying to deal with old anger issues in the New lax Hollywood. Adolph Zukor (Adolph Cukor) (1873-1976) - Hungarian/American producer. Outer: Of Hungarian/Jewish descent. Came to America at the age of 15 with his family and worked in an upholstery shop, before becoming a sweeper in a NY fur store, where he learned the business over the next 2 years. Started designing and sewing fur pieces and then selling them himself, before moving to Chicago in 1892, where he started his own fur business, Zukor’s Novelty Fur Company, which he quickly expanded. Married Lottie Kaufman in 1897, 2 children from the union, which lasted until her death in 1956.. Moved back to NYC, now quite prosperous, while evincing a sophistication that eluded many of his future fellow émigré kings of Hollywood. Entered into the fledgling penny arcade business in 1903, via a cousin, and was joined two years later by Marcus Loew (Mike Ovitz), ultimately becoming treasurer of the latter’s large chain of film theaters. In 1912, he left Loew and became a distributor after buying the exclusive American rights to a Sarah Bernhardt (Laurie Anderson) film La Reine Elisabeth, and made a killing on it. 2 years later, he produced the first American-made feature, The Prisoner of Zenda. Formed Famous Players, with the idea of silently shooting great actors in their best known vehicles, “Famous Players in Famous Plays,” and did so to further success, despite the static nature of his presentations. By introducing ‘art’ to an audience with no perspective on it, but eager to experience it uncritically, he was able to tap into a unique public vein. Recognized diminutive Mary Pickford as America’s potential sweetheart, and initially rode the fortunes of his studio on her, as she became the biggest female star of the decade. Became one of the first to recognize the importance of stars, and lavished them with huge salaries, while also seeing the more outlets he had, the more he could sell his product. In 1916, he merged with Jesse Lasky’s (Garth Brooks) Feature Play Company, to become Famous Players - Lasky Corp., with himself as president, and the following year he became head of Paramount, which was its distribution company, and by which it would ultimately become known, as one of Hollywood’s premier studios and major players, after initially being called Paramount-Publix. Revolutionized the movie industry by organizing production, distribution and exhibition under one corporate roof, and through his shrewd leadership, Paramount became the industry leader of the teens and 20s, so that by 1921, it was the most powerful and profitable film company in the world. Introduced block booking so as to lessen the financial risk to any singular picture, while also guaranteeing a constant supply of product for his exhibitors. A fount of innovation, he was largely responsible for many of the business practices of the fledgling industry, while also proving to be a canny judge of potential talent and material. By 1925, he also had the largest theater chain. In 1933, the company was forced to declare bankruptcy, and was reorganized as Paramount Pictures, Inc. Although he was forced out as part of the reorganization, he was brought back in by its new head, Barney Balaban, mid-decade to become chairman of the board, a figurehead position he maintained until his death at the extremely advanced age of 103. Wrote his autobiography, ”The Public Is Never Wrong,” in 1953. Formally retired from Paramount in 1959, although continued to hold the title of Chairman Emeritus, as a living legend of early Hollywood. Inner: Shrewd, intelligent and highly innovative, with excellent business instincts, and an innate surety of what his public wanted. Self-enthroning lifetime of turning his fine eye to the business world, and transliterating his gift for acquisition into a memorable run as the most important business maestro of the fledgling movie industry. Carlos III (1716-1788) - Spanish king. Outer: Of the House of Bourbon. 5th son of Felipe V (Desi Arnaz), and eldest son of his second wife, Elizabeth Farnese (Lucille Ball). Half-brother of his predecessor Ferdinand VI (Jesse Lasky), and older brother of Felipe, Duke of Parma (Wallace Shawn). Lean and ascetic-looking with a prominent Bourbon nose. Became Duke of Parma, through his mother, at the age of 16, which gave him a far greater sense of rule than he ever would have received at the Spanish court. In 1734, his troops defeated Austria, although he showed little real interest in military affairs afterwards, particularly the tiresome pomp and ceremony that went with them. Harbored a great resentment towards England, for its threats to his rule, which would ultimately lead him to some unfortunate decisions when he became king of Spain. Resigned Parma to the HRE the following year, and was recognized as the king of the Two Sicilies. In 1738, he married Maria Amalia (Dakota Johnson), the eldest daughter of the King of Poland, who was elector of Saxony, 6 sons and 6 daughters from the close union, including Maria Luisa (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) with seven surviving into adulthood. His eldest son, Felipe, was an imbecile, drooler and molester, and was impolitely removed to Naples, as far from the throne as possible. Worked hard to improve the lot of his Italian subjects, through reform and good choices in his ministers, and ceded a healthy throne to his 3rd son, Ferdinand, when he succeeded his brother as King of Spain in 1759. His wife died the following year, and he did not marry again, remaining loyal to her memory. Seen as a benevolent despot, he proved to be a very active reformer, and far more effective at home than he was with his overseas policies, thanks in goodly part to his lack of interest in military affairs or improving his armies. Suffered losses in the New World’s contretemps, particularly the 7 Years’ War as an ally of France, and reluctantly joined France in its alliance with the American colonies during the latter’s Revolutionary War, despite the threat it held to his own New World holdings. Far more interested in making Spain a first-rate power from the inside out, than as a dominant martial empire. Issued a number of formal edicts around dress and behavior which did not go well with his people, causing a riot in 1766, from which he promptly removed himself, in his ongoing distaste for confrontation. Blamed the Jesuits for it, and expelled them the following year, in an express desire to separate Church’n’State, and reduce the power and presence of the former, despite being an active Roman Catholic. Abolished ancient legislation which curtailed the country’s economic growth, and built up its infrastructure, with new roads, canals and drainage works. A great patron of the arts, he built the world-class Prado Museum and completed the vast Oriente Palace, commissioning Giovanni Tiepolo (Pablo Picasso) to memorably decorate it. His greatest passion was for hunting, and he often wore his hunting clothes beneath his court dress so as to be able to speed away as fast possible from royal ceremonies, which he despised. Succeeded by his second son, Carlos IV, after leaving Spain in far better shape culturally and economically than when he first ascended the throne. Inner: Placid temperament, and considerate, with a caustic tongue, and a cynical overview. Authoritarian, cultured and curiously anti-militarist for a ruler of his time, although it impelled him to put his energies on domestic affairs, where he proved quite effective. Reformist lifetime of focusing on the internal life of his country, and proving himself highly effective in the cultural and economic realms, which he would concentrate on exclusively in his next major go-round in this series. Gaspar de Guzman, Conte Di Olivares e duca di Sanlucar (Gaspar de Guzman y Pimental) (1585-1645) - Spanish prime minister. Outer: Father was the Spanish ambassador to Rome, where he was born, while his mother was of the Castilian nobility and died young. 2nd son, with his older brother dying in infancy, three younger sisters. Studied for the priesthood, gaining a degree from the Univ. of Salamanca in law, theology and the arts in 1604. By 1607, he was orphaned and became heir to one of Spain’s largest fortunes, as well as his sire’s titles. The same year he married his cousin and niece, Ines de Zuniga y Velasco, to whom he was related on both sides. She, in turn, had been lady-in-waiting to the queen, and he became one of Prince Felipe’s (Walt Disney) personal attendants in 1615. By the time the latter was crowned as Felipe IV in 1621, he had wormed his way into the teenager’s affections as irreplaceable. Given the coveted grade of grandee, as well as Duque de San Lucar, while greedily holding onto his inherited title, going against precedence, so that he would be known as El conde-duque. From 1623 until 1643, he held the position as prime minister of Spain, showing great loyalty to the king, and an unquestioned patriotism. Effected numerous economic reforms, to ameliorate the country’s longtime dependence on precious metals from the New World, and make it more competitive with the shipping interests of the rest of western Europe, but was met with bitter resistance from his fellow Castilian nobles, who looked down on mercantilism as unworthy of their aristocratic interests. Tried to centralize power in the hands of the king and his main ministers, only to inspire revolts towards the end of his run by both the Catalans and the Portuguese, as well as an abortive conspiracy by the southern Andalusian states to create their own kingdom. Involved Spain in the 30 Years’ War, in hopes of linking the interests of Spain with the Austrian Habsburgs, only to find France eclipsing Spanish power through his efforts. A certain inevitability accompanied his various failures, thanks to a country petrified by a rigid caste system, and unwilling to meet the demands of the rapidly changing world around it. In declining health, he fell prey to a court intrigue spearheaded by the queen, and was removed from office in 1643, while court factions made sure the reluctant king stuck to his decision. Wrote a letter of apology, and was exiled along with his wife to the city of Toro, and became active in the city’s affairs, before dying of natural causes, 6 months after the Inquisition began investigating him. Inner: Moody, with an instinct for power and a genuine gift for seeing some of the larger patterns of the world around him, despite pursuing policies that would help him retain the king’s favor, rather than help the country-at-large. Collected a vast array of state papers, both ancient and modern, and had a huge aviary. Largely thwarted lifetime of being hampered by an ossified aristocracy in much of what he wished to accomplish, perhaps as reflection of unintegrated parts of his own character, necessitating an ultimate change to the business world, like many of his fellow future Hollywoodians of the Spanish royal house, where he would be allowed far freer reign in pursuing his various visions. John of Brienne (c1148-1237) - French king of the Latin Kingdom of Jerusalem and Latin emperor of Constantinople. Outer: Father was a French count. As a penniless younger son, he was originally destined for a Church career, but opted to be a knight instead. Spent the next 40 years in tournaments and fights, winning a considerable reputation for his prowess in the arena, while socializing with the minor nobility of France. Befriended by Philippe II Augustus (FDR), the king of France, he was selected by him to marry Marie of Montferrat (Sean Young), the queen of the Latin Kingdom of Jerusalem, which he did in 1210, ascending that throne when he was in his 60s, and assuming the title of king in his wife’s name. She died 2 years later in childbirth, and he was made regent for their daughter, Yolande, who ultimately inherited the crown as Isabella II (Melanie Griffith). In 1214, he married the daughter of the Armenian king, one son from union. Arranged a 5 year truce with the Sultan of Egypt and Syria, and during it, persuaded the pope to launch the 5th Crusade to support his daughter’s kingdom. In 1218, he joined the crusading force in an expedition against the Egyptian port of Damietta, during which time his wife died. Quarreled with the crusade leader, a cardinal legate, over tactics, urging caution and an acceptable treaty, while the latter wanted to go fall speed ahead, and disgustedly left Egypt in 1220, before returning the following year to see the expedition go up in flames, as he had thought it would. In 1223, he went to Italy, where he met both the pope and HRE Frederich II (Yukio Mishima), and betrothed his daughter Yolande to the latter, in order to have the Holy Roman Empire more closely connected to the Holy Land. Traveled to France and England, finding little support there, and went to Spain, where the king, Alfonso IX of Leon, offered him the promise of his kingdom and his eldest daughter, but he chose her younger sister, Berengaria of Castile, 2 sons and 2 daughters from the union. After visiting Germany, he returned to Rome in 1225, only to find his son-in-law, Friedrich II, contest his rights to his crown. Despite his age, he commanded the papal troops in a revenge attack on southern italy in the emperor’s absence. In 1228, now 80 years old, he was invited to Constantinople by the barons of that empire, to be regent and co-emperor with the young Baldwin II (Roland Emmerich), on condition that the latter marry his second daughter and succeed him. Crowned co-emperor in 1231, he helped fend off attacks by the Bulgarian tsar, and Nicaean emperor, and ultimately died in the habit of a Franciscan friar, having shown himself extraordinarily vigorous into advanced old age. Inner: Constantly penniless, while using his wits and his wives and his daughters to further himself. Probably a physical marvel, with the ability to remain vital well beyond the span of ordinary years. Knight errant lifetime of derring and do, and ultimately being rewarded with not only a kingship, but an emperorhood as well, as testament to his tenacity, his skills and his cleverness.


Storyline: The amusing muse finds herself equally adept both behind and in front of the camera, learning from her mentors, before giving her own dramatic eye the opportunity of unique self-expression.

Diane Keaton (Diane Hall) (1946) - American actress and photographer. Outer: Paternal grandfather was a barber who was murdered in a labor dispute. Mother was an accomplished amateur photographer, who once bore the crown of Mrs. Los Angeles, father was a civil engineer who became successful later in life. Oldest of 4, with a brother and two sisters in a tight-knit family. Her parents were Methodists, extremely close to her mother, whom she has labeled as ‘the love of her life.’ Grew up in a tract home, in a socially conservative climate. A poor student at school, she expressed herself through her unusual taste in dress. Went to Santa Ana Junior College, but quit after a year and a half to study acting at NYC’s Neighborhood Playhouse. Used her mother’s maiden name as her professional one. Sang and danced with a rock group and did summer stock, before making her Broadway debut in ‘Hair’ in her early 20s, initially as an understudy and finally as a lead. Refused, however, to take her clothes off on stage like most of the rest of the cast. Later admitted she binged on 20,000 calories a day after being ordered to lose 10 pounds for “Hair,” before bulimically purging herself of them in what she characterized as the worst period of her life. Played opposite Woody Allen in his Broadway rendition of Play it Again Sam, and became his muse for several years, appearing in a number of his films. Made her movie debut in Lovers and Other Strangers in her mid-20s, before reaching her early peak in Woody Allen’s Annie Hall in her early 30s, which mimicked her real-life relationship with him, and allowed her to become a style-setter with her thrown-together male attire in that film. Eventually left him for Warren Beatty, playing opposite him in Reds, several years later. Also involved with Al Pacino. A versatile photographer, she published two books in the 1980s, Reservations and Still Life, and added two more collections later on. Also an enthusiastic house renovator. Made her directorial debut in her early 40s with an offbeat documentary called, Heaven, then served her directing apprenticeship on TV, before emerging as an imaginative film director, with Unstrung Heroes in 1995. Formed her own production company, Blue Relief, with a partner. Scored a large hit with First Wife’s Club, although far more interested in being behind, rather than in front of the camera, as she matures. Adopted a daughter in her late 40s, and a son in her mid-50s, while remaining single, feeling marriage has never really been an option for her, while throwing herself wholeheartedly into motherhood, with a well-staffed household to support her. Shot her first nude scene at 57 in Something’s Gotta Give, while playing against her innate lifelong resistance to losing herself to love, which she has always felt has brought out the worst in her. Lost her beloved mother in 2008, and penned a combined memoir of the both of them, “Then Again,” in 2011.Given the AFI Life Achievement Award in 2017. Has a net worth of $50 million. Inner: Charming, off-beat, eccentric, highly ambitious. Extremely self-involved, high energy, completely filling her days with tasks. Great believer in analysis. Never lost herself in a relationship, feeling far too guarded and wary. I am a camera lifetime of exploring herself both in front of and behind the lens’ eye, after serving as an amusing muse for others, but never allowing them to dominate her. Lucille McVey Drew (1890-1925) - American actress and director. Outer: Educated at the Sedalia College of Music and the Nebraska School of Expression, before hitting the boards, appearing on stage in both the U.S. and Canada. Joined Vitagraph productions in 1913 as a scriptwriter and married Sidney Drew (Wallace Shawn), who was nearly twice her age, shortly after his first wife’s death in 1914. Costarred with her husband, in several domestic comedies, using the nom de screen of June Morrow or Mrs. Sidney Drew. When the latter died in 1919, she gave up acting, and turned her towards directing, beginning in 1920, doing two reel comedies, based on a series of stories by a popular magazine writer of the time. Did a well-received feature, although her career was cut short by an extended illness. Inner: Foreshortened lifetime of getting her proverbial celluloid feet wet via a supportive mate from a famous acting family, before returning to a full-fledged career both in front of and behind the cameras on her own. Louise- Elizabeth de France (Marie Louise-Elizabeth) (1727-1759) - French princess and Parmese Duchess. Outer: Eldest daughter of Louis XV (Mikhail Gorbachev) and Maria Leszczynska (Pola Negri), and one of a pair of twin sisters, along with Henriette-Anne. One of 10 children, including the dauphin, her only other sibling to marry. In 1739, at the age of 11, she was engaged by proxy to her cousin, Felipe, the younger son of Felipe V (Desi Arnaz) of Spain and Isabella Farnese (Lucille Ball), in a longheld tradition of uniting the two Bourbon houses via marriages. Unhappily left Versailles later that year to meet and marry her intended, in what would prove to be an mismatched union for her. Married later that year, two daughters, including Marie-Luis (Gloria Trevi), and future queen of Spain, and a son from the union. Thoroughly dominated by her mother-in-law Isabella, and restricted by the far more rigid etiquette of the Spanish court, she retreated into herself, extending her interrupted childhood with dolls, while treating her first daughter, who was less than a decade and a half younger than she, more like a playmate than a princess. Later one of her husband’s sisters married her younger brother, the dauphin. Expressed her unhappiness with her life in Spain to her father in letters, and in 1748, received a reprieve when the Duchy of Parma was ceded to Spain, and her husband was made its ruling Duke. On the way to Parma, she stopped off at Versailles, and wound up spending a year there. In 1749, she joined her husband in Parma, and brought French customs and cuisine to the court there, where she finally got to flex a little cultural muscle outside the dominating influence of her mother-in-law. In 1752, her twin sister died, and she returned to Versailles to mourn her, staying for almost a year. Unhappy with her small duchy, with no chance to expand on her desire for rule over a larger polity, she turned to Maria Theresa (Mary Renault), the Holy Roman empress, despite the latter’s antagonistic stance towards Spain, and was promised the throne of Netherlands, which had fallen back to Austrian rule. To cement the deal, she hoped to marry her eldest daughter to Maria’s son Joseph II (Michael Moore), and returned to France in 1757 to effect the match, which came about after her premature death. Linked by rumor to an abbot she had known in Parma, although the allegation was never proven. In 1759, her brother-in-law Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher) ascended the throne of Spain, and later that year, while visiting Versailles, she suddenly took ill with smallpox and died. Buried with her twin sister rather than her husband. Inner: Frustrated lifetime of serving as a pawn in the larger political game of the Catholic elements of the continent, while unhappily dealing with various elements of her longtime family. Isabella (1172-1205) - Queen of Jerusalem. Outer: Daughter of Amalric I (Harold Alexander), king of Jerusalem, by his second wife, Maria Comnen, a Byzantine princess. Spent the early part of her life at her mother and stepfather’s court. Black-haired and fair-complexioned. Although her father’s first marriage to Agnes of Courtenay (Mary Pickford) had been annulled, her stepbrother, Baldwin IV (Benecio Del Toro), was the declared heir, despite his suffering from incurable leprosy, which made her position as a possible heiress to the throne extremely tenable. When she was 8, she was betrothed to Humphrey IV of Toron (Wallace Shawn), in payment of a battle debt by Baldwin, and they were wed 3 years later, when her husband was around 16, and she was but 11, in what would prove to be a very amicable relationship for both. On their wedding night, their castle was attacked by the Saracen forces of the Egyptian sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff), although her mother-in-law convinced him to leave the newlyweds be. Her contacts with her family were limited afterwards by her marriage in-laws for political reasons, so that her marriage, in effect, ended her connection with her past. Because Baldwin didn’t care for his brother-in-law, Guy de Lusignan (Desi Arnaz), who had married his sister Sibylla (Lucille Ball), he designated his nephew, the future Baldwin V (Raoul Julia) as his successor. Both Baldwins died in succession in 1185 and 1186, and Sibylla was crowned queen, and immediately had Guy co-crowned with her, while her own husband, Humphrey, who had no desire to be king, readily submitted to him. Sibylla died in 1190, and Guy’s martiality was no match for Saladin’s. Though close to her spouse, he had little of the warrior in him, so that her mother and stepfather abducted her from him, and forced her to consent to an underage annulment, to which Humphrey meekly assented. Married in 1190 to the far more ambitious Conrad of Montferrat (Richard Harris), a proven warrior, and as the uncle of Baldwin V, his nearest kinsman, and already twice married. One daughter from the union, Marie (Melanie Griffith). Conrad then became king of Jerusalem, despite an interregnum by Guy, and was officially confirmed in 1192. Soon afterwards, he was set upon in the street and stabbed to death by Hashshashin, assassins who were habitually doped to the gills, and he died the same day, probably at the instigation of Richard I (Richard Burton) of England, without ever having been crowned. Two days later, she was betrothed to the handsome and gallant Henri of Champagne, the nephew of both the king of France and king of England, with whom she immediately fell in love, despite being pregnant at the time. The duo were married 8 days after Conrad’s death, 2 daughters from union. Her husband died in 1197, when a balcony or window trellis gave way, and he accidentally plunged to his death, along with a servant. Soon afterwards, she was married for a fourth and final time to Amalric II (Walt Disney), the subsequent king of both Cyprus and Jerusalem. Her husband died shortly after their infant son in 1205, and she soon followed him to be succeeded by her eldest daughter, Marie. Inner: Although largely a pawn, managed to find two of her mates emotionally nurturing, for a 50% score, which was a far better than average for medieval multi-marrieds of her time. Pawn lifetime of finding love and companionship with half her mates, in a go-round over which she had little control, probably souring her on queenship as a viable pathway to truly seeing and being herself.


Storyline: The cerebral comedian incarnates into rich cultural milieus in order to explore his dual interests in high and low entertainment and give expression to an unusual sensibility which can comfortably embrace both.

Wallace Shawn (1943) - American playwright and actor. Outer: Father was William Shawn, a worldclass neurotic, who became the longtime editor of the New Yorker. Mother, Cecille Lyon, was also journalist. One of 5 children, of whom 3 survived, although the twin sister of his younger brother Allen, who became a phobic composer, teacher and writer, was institutionalized for life at the age of 8. Father also led a double life, with a longtime relationship with writer Lillian Ross, making for a strained household. Grew up in a highly cultured, as well as protected, environment, where most things remained unspoken, giving him the desire later on to address uncomfortable issues. His sire played the piano every night, while he discovered he had the gift of making other people laugh, despite his serious intellectual mien and well-developed sense of esthetics. With his brother Allen, he used to put on family puppet shows, and like him, studied music as the Putney School. 5’4 1/2”. Graduated Harvard, before going onto Oxford Univ., where he got a BA in philosophy, politics and economics. Taught English in India on a Fullbright scholarship, initially thinking of the foreign service as a career, then became a teacher in NYC, although he always had a strong draw towards the stage. Won an Obie for his first Off-Broadway play in 1975, “Our Late Night,” and has gone on to a three-pronged career of looking at the darker side of interconnections through mordant eyes via avant-garde theater, acting in commercial venues, and his own writing. Made his stage debut in 1977 with his own translation of Machiavelli’s (George Bernard Shaw) “The Mandrake.” Although short and balding with a slight lisp, he has used his unprepossessing physicality to excellent comic effect in his commercial fare characterizations, beginning with his film debut in Manhattan in 1979 in which he played the ex-husband of his former-life wife, Diane Keaton. Most at home, however, writing for adventurous theatergoers. Won a second Obie in 1986 for “Aunt Dan & Lemon,” and a third in 1991 for “The Fever.” Active on the NY stage as both actor and playwright, he has managed to create a unique niche for himself, while giving expression to his own off-kilter view of those two staples of modern existence, life and love. Has had a longtime association with writer Deborah Eisenberg, although not a believer in marriage. A deep sense of alarm over the Bush administration’s policy, led him to edit “Final Edition,” in 2004, a one-time journal dedicated to raising the level of communication in an increasingly dumbed-down and provincial America. Eventually teamed with brother Allen to write “The Music Teacher,” which was finally given its performance due in 2006, a near quarter century after it was first penned. Inner: Brooding, self-involved, and philosophic, with a keen wit, a high theatrical intelligence and the ability to laugh at himself. Optimistic, with a great belief in the power of language and idea. Arch-penned lifetime of expanding his considerable theatrical skills, while also giving play to the innate clown that lies at his soul. Sidney Drew (1864-1919) - American comic actor. Outer: Adopted son of Mrs. Louisa Drew (Lucille Ball), although looked quite like her. Her husband had been touring for years, so a deception may have been made to insure his legitimacy. Grew up in a theatrical environment, and went on to his own career on stage and the early days of cinema, although never rose to the same heights as the rest of his family, and is better known through his connection with them than anything memorable that he did, despite a unique comic talent of his own. Married actress and playwright Gladys Rankin, who was also from a well-known acting clan, in his late 20s. The billed pair toured in marital comedies and also played vaudeville. Son from union, S. Rankin Drew, was an actor and director, as well. Soon after his wife’s death in 1914, he married actress Lucille McVey (Diane Keaton), and often worked with her in silent comedy. Their son was killed during WWI, which hastened his own demise. Died of uremic poisoning and heart disease. Inner: Second banana lifetime of getting a strong theatrical foundation from his longtime family, setting the stage for exploring his considerable dramatic intellect and comic skills the next time around. Felipe, Duke of Parma (1720-1765) - Spanish noble. Outer: From the Spanish House of Bourbon. 4th child of 7 offspring of Felipe V (Desi Arnaz) of Spain, and his second wife, Isabella Farnese (Lucille Ball). Younger half-brother of Luis I (Raul Julia), and younger sibling of the future Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher). Grew up in a cultured environment, evincing a far greater interest in music and art than politics. In 1739, he was engaged by proxy to his cousin, Louise-Elizabeth (Diane Keaton), the eldest daughter of Louis XV (Mikhail Gorbachev) and Maria Leszczynska (Pola Negri) of France, in a union of ruling Catholic families, despite the consanguinity of the double Bourbon match. The two were wed later that year, in an unhappy union that produced two daughters and a son, including future Spanish queen Marie-Luisa (Gloria Trevi). His mother’’s family had ruled the Italian Duchy of Parma for many a generation, and it had passed down to an older brother, before it had been exchanged with Austria after the War of the Polish Succession. A dozen years later, it was back in Spanish hands, when the Austrian empress Maria Theresa (Mary Renault), was forced to cede it, and he became its new ruler in 1748. Inherited a war-torn province, but proved to be an enlightened ruler. Drew good ministers, as well as thinkers, to him, and was able to restore its economy, while also focusing on education and philosophy. His wife, who had taken every advantage afforded her of not being by his side, died of smallpox in 1759, and instead of establishing a family tomb, was buried by her twin sister in France. Outlived his eldest daughter, who died in 1763, as well. In 1768, he expelled the Jesuits. Died suddenly, while bringing his youngest daughter to Spain to marry the future Carlos IV (Johnny Weissmuller) of Spain. Inner: Cultured and cerebral, and a good delegator of authority. Benign rule lifetime amidst longtime family members, allowing him to display his skills over a small duchy, while also dealing with clouded matrimonial intimacy, with an equally longtime partner. Humphrey IV of Toron (c1066-c1193) - French Latin Kingdom noble. Outer: Grandfather had been a constable of Jerusalem. Son of a Latin Kingdom noble, the third in his line, and an heiress. Became lord of Toron in 1179, when his grandfather died of his wounds after saving the life of young Baldwin IV (Benecio Del Toro), the king of Jerusalem. The following year, he was betrothed to Isabella (Diane Keaton), the daughter of Amalric I (Harold Alexander), the deceased king of Jerusalem, with the agreement that his territory of Toron be added to the royal portfolio, making him, in essence, the dowry-bearer in the marriage. The duo were wed in 1183, with Isabella age 11 at the time, only to find the tower in which they were lodged in honeymooning bliss, besieged by the Egyptian sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff), until his mother played on the Saracen’s noble heart, and he forewent their tower abode, although continued besieging the rest of the fortress. When Baldwin V died in 1186, his stepfather tried to convince him to claim the throne of Jerusalem in his wife’s name, but instead, he chose to support Guy de Lusignan’s (Desi Arnaz) claim, since he was husband to his wife’s older half-sister, Sibylla (Lucille Ball), who had the right of inheritance. The following year, he was captured at the Battle of Hattin, which effectively ended the kingdom’s real power, but was released and went to Kerak to help prepare it for a coming seige by the conquering Saladin, only to be captured again and set free. Jerusalem’s barons were less than enamored of Guy’s leadership, and when Sibylla died in 1190, the question of his wife’s succession came up again, but he remained completely uninterested in being another uneasy crowned head, and maintained his loyalty to Guy. His wife’s relatives now turned towards Conrad of Montferrat (Richard Harris), uncle of Baldwin, as a promising alternative, since he had shown genuine skill as a warrior, and little hesitancy about leadership. When his wife was told to divorce him, she protested vehemently, citing his kindness, but she was abducted, and the marriage was annulled on the grounds of her being underage at the time of her wedding. When he was subsequently challenged to a trial by combat, he politely demurred, and meekly let her go. After her new marriage, he was awarded the territories he had lost. Fluent in Arabic, he was subsequently able to translate for the English king, Richard I (Richard Burton), when the Third Crusade got under way, and he probably died soon after, with his territories going to his sister and her family. Inner: Kind, effeminate and soft of manner, with halting speech, and none of the warrior panache of his peers. Throne-rejecting lifetime of depending on his social skills in an era that demanded martiality, and though batted about considerably by far more forceful personalities, still able to function according to his abilities.


Storyline: The lustrous latina hands in her mantle as pure eye candy, and turns her considerable energy into becoming a multi-talented singer, actress and entrepreneur, to prove to herself and everyone else that she is worth their attention and admiration for her abilities rather than just her looks.

Maria Conchita Alonso (Maria Concepcion Alonso Bustillo) (1957) - Cuban/Venezuelan/ American actress and singer. Outer: Moved to Venezuela with her family when she was 5. A beauty contest winner as a teen, she was the first runner-up for Miss Venezuela in 1975, and the 6th finalist in the Miss World pageant that year, which launched her film career in her adopted country. 5’6 1/2”. Sang for a band named Ambar, and began a successful solo career in 1982, singing in English, as well as Spanish. Her 2nd album, in 1984, made her a Spanish-language superstar. The same year, she began her Hollywood film career, with Moscow on the Hudson, and continued to put her passionate imprint on her succeeding roles, despite usually playing hyphenated Americans, thanks to her strong accent. In 1995, she became the first Latina to star in a Broadway show, with “Kiss of the Spider Woman.” An active entrepreneur, she formed her own record label, Ambar Entertainment, as well as her own production company, Ambyth Productions, and a fashion line named Soy, Spanish for ‘I am.’ Became a US citizen in 2005. An outspoken critic of Venezuelan presidente Hugo Chavez, she is also a conservative Republican in her adopted homeland. Inner: Animal-lover, athletic, and multi-lingual, and very much her own woman. Independent lifetime of making her own way, without intimate male support, as a testament to her desire for resurrection as a self-defined entertainment force, rather than the limited male fantasy she had been in her previous go-round in this series. Maria Montez (Maria Africa Vidal de Santo Silas) (1918-1951) - Dominican/American actress. Outer: Father was the Spanish consul to the Dominican Republic when she was born. Second daughter of 10 children. A striking beauty, she returned to Europe to pursue her acting career, despite extremely limited abilities. 5’7”. Married at 17 to William McFeeters, a British army officer, soon divorced, and wound up working in NYC as a model, before embarking on a screen career in 1940 that was based on her physicality and little else. Won early attention by making grand appearances at the studio commissary, looking like a walking floor show and making her meals into bits of performance art. After bit parts, she quickly found her niche in a series of campy exotic adventure sex-and-sand tales, beginning as Scheherazade in The Arabian Nights in 1942. Her subsequent fare was set in various projected localities around the world, and she soon became known as “The Queen of Technicolor,” for her fantasy romps on screen, which featured lavish costuming around her lissome body, and singing and dancing, at which she was equally inept. Eventually began putting on weight, when the public tired of the thinness of her talent. Her 2nd husband was French actor Jean-Pierre Aumont, whom she married in 1943, and followed to Europe, continuing her career there in both French and Italian action films. One daughter from union, Tina Marquand, also became an actress. Began taking grueling hot baths to lose weight and died of a heart attack while immersed in one of them, although she remains a favorite of aficionados of decorative acting. Inner: Driven and highly ambitious. Obsessed with astrology, accurately told by an astrologer her life would end quite suddenly. High camp lifetime of enjoying a brief ride of fame and fortune on the basis of her spectacular beauty, only to quickly flame out and drown her hot heart in her own sea of overwrought sorrow over her subsequent failures. Maria Christina (Maria Cristina Ferdinanda) (1806-1878) - Spanish regent and queen. Outer: From the Austrian House of Hapsburg, as well as the Bourbon royal House of Spain. Daughter of Francis I of the Two Sicilies, and his second wife, Maria Isabella of Spain. Tall, curvaceous and beautiful. Although she had a limited intellect, she had good common sense, along with a desire to enjoy royal prerogatives to the full. Had few confidants, thanks to her regal manner. Became the fourth wife of Ferdinand VII in 1829, who was her uncle both by birth and marriage, since he and her mother were brothers and sisters, while his own father and mother were first cousins. To top off the incestuous blue blood connection, her husband’s first wife had been the sister of her sire, while one of his other wives had also been his niece. Her two direct predecessors had died prematurely, producing only one short-lived daughter between them, so that the autocratic monarch was still very much in need of an heir. Instead of the desired son, however, she produced two daughters, including Isabella II, but convinced her husband to suspend Salic Law in his will, so that the latter could inherit the throne. This claim would later be disputed by the king’s younger brother, Don Carlos, which would precipitate the Carlist Wars between the country’s traditionalists and Catholic power structure, and its liberal elements, which wanted a far more progressive social state based on a liberal constitution. The army supported the latter group, so it ultimately prevailed. Shortly after her husband’s death in 1833, she secretly married an ex-sergeant of the royal guard, who was given the title of duc. 6 children from the union, all of whom were ennobled. Served as regent for her daughter for seven years, but when the news of her clandestine marriage was made public, she became an extremely unpopular figure. Forced to step down by the army and the country’s liberal leadership, which had earlier created a constitutional monarchy in 1837, she was replaced in 1840 by the army commander. Made to leave the country, she tried one more stab at returning to power, before going into permanent exile in France. Her daughter was dethroned in 1868, after a successful revolution, and joined her mother in exile, after ceding the throne to her son, Alfonso XII, who made both his female predecessors personae non grata in his government. Although both she and her daughter were granted permission to visit Spain in 1874, neither was allowed to live there, or exert any influence on their successor. Wound up permanently alienated from her daughter, and her other offspring, as well, and died very much alone in exile. Although her live self had been barred from Spain, her body was permitted to be buried in the royal crypt in the El Escorial monastery, an honor not accorded her husband’s first three wives, since they provided no royal offspring. Inner: Sense of piety, along with an enjoyment of pleasure, and a stubborn sense of determination. Born to rule lifetime of immensely enjoying her power while she could, only to experience a long downfall and exile, to reassess herself, before returning to the magical kingdom of Hollywood, to try to re-establish her desired supremacy there.


Storyline: The guerrilla general and high-flying hero writes his name large in the archetypal record book, as symbol of intrepid unifying tenacity despite being both ahead of and behind his times in his vanguard social views and vainglorious political aspirations, before turning to make-believe kingdoms to open himself up to the emotions underlying his actions.

Antonio Banderas (Jose Antonio Dominquez Bandera) (1960) - Spanish actor. Outer: Mother was a schoolteacher, father was a policeman. Older of 2 brothers. Had a middle-class upbringing, but grew up shy and fearful, thanks to the former, who had witnessed many atrocities during the Spanish Civil War as a child, and carried them with her, her entire life. Grew up during the dictatorship of Francisco Franco, and went out of his way not to be noticed at Catholic school. Excelled at soccer, but broke his foot at 14, which ended his dreams of becoming a professional player. After viewing a production of “Hair,” at the same time, he saw that acting was the venue he was really looking for, in order to open himself up. Joined a repertory group then took classes at Malaga’s School of Dramatic Arts for 4 years. 5'7 1/2" and strikingly handsome. After playing a lead at 19, he was advised to go to Madrid, although his mother’s fears prevented him from initially leaving home. Following a period of depression, he moved to Madrid with $75 in his pocket, but only found roles in small production companies, and, after 6 months, he returned to Malaga, to wrestle with himself, before returning to Madrid, and was rewarded by being asked to join the elite national theater. Discovered by filmmaker Pedro Almodovar, he made his film debut in that director’s Labyrinth of Passion, in which he played a homophile, a part that allowed him to overcome any residual anxieties he had about playing any character. Almodovar would go on to become both a friend and a mentor, using him often, so that he became a big star in Spain during the 1980s. In 1988, he married Spanish actress Ana Leza. As Almodovar’s work became accessible to American audiences, so did he, and in 1992, he was cast as a Cuban musician in his first English-language film, The Mambo Kings, which led to support roles, before Richard Rodriguez’s low budget Desperado in 1995, made him an American star as well, and the latter would also become a frequent collaborator. Separated from his wife, because of his desire for both a family and an American film career, he became involved with his co-star on Two Much, Melanie Griffith, the same year, much to the sniping of the Spanish press, who said he had gone Hollywood on his own country. As soon as his divorce was final in 1996, he married Griffith, and the duo went on to have a daughter together, to go along with her two sons from previous unions. The pair formed a production company, Green Moon, which produced Crazy in Alabama, with him directing and her starring, as well as their daughter appearing, although it proved a disappointment. Thanks to a sly humor, to go along with his smoldering looks, he has been able to forge an eclectic career, displaying a charming ease in comedy, drama and sheer action, as an international star, who always enhances whatever vehicle he is in, thanks to his heroic past, and his hidden high-flying sense of himself. A businessman, as well, he markets Andalusian products in both the U.S. and Spain. Sadly, after 18 years of marriage, his wife filed for divorce in 2014, citing irreconcilable differences. Suffered a heart attack in early 2017, but quickly recovered from it. Has a net worth of $48 million. Inner: Domestic and dedicated to both family and career. Passionate fan of the soccer club, Real Madrid. Emotion-enriching lifetime of switching from the hardcore political arena to the far softer stage of self-expression, as a means of opening himself up and allowing his passions to be channeled into the personal, rather than the national, for his own private growth. Italo Balbo (1896-1940) - Italian general. Outer: Parents were school teachers, born in a schoolhouse. Father came from a long military tradition, but was forced to pursue a teacher’s career and showed himself to be a severe and inflexible patriot. Raised in a highly political household, he took on the same restless, patriotic authoritarianism as his sire. Youngest son in family. His mother was highly religious, and he was close to the female members of his birth crew. An indifferent student, he was far too undisciplined for academics, but gregarious and outgoing. Became a journalist at 14, then studied at Florence Univ. and the Institute of Social Science in Rome, before serving as an officer in the Alpine Corps in WW I, and gaining a reputation as a courageous fighter. Studied in Florence afterwards, and gained a degree in social sciences, before becoming a bank clerk. Joined Benito Mussolini’s Fascist Party, and formed his own gang, breaking strikes for landowners, and attacking rival ‘ists.’ Participated in the Blackshirt March on Rome, as a fascist leader, which helped install Mussolini in power. Always on parade in a dashing outfit of jodhpurs, black jacket and fez, he was constantly chasing after women. Charged with murdering a priest, he fled to Rome, and was made a general of militia by Mussolini, then undersecretary of state for air, air minister and air marshal. Married Donna Manu in his late 20s, 3 children from the union. Seen as a reincarnation of Ferrara’s past glories. Became the personification of Italy’s desire to become an air power, upgrading both its military and commercial air force, while piling up the frequent flier miles as evidence of the country’s commitment to supremacy in that realm. In 1933, he led a sky-borne armada across the ocean, and was wildly feted in Chicago for the feat, with a million Chicagoans giving him the fascist salute as he paraded down Michigan avenue. Pro-British, and immensely popular, he was seen as an equal to Mussolini in charisma and salesmanship, so that the dictator began to view him as a rival, and appointed him governor-general of Libya in order to take him out of the national limelight. Despite complete misgivings on the assignment, he modernized its capital Tripoli, as an arch-filled testament to Fascist will while attracting tourists with air races and Grand Prix events. Oversaw the “Balbia,” a stratgic road that ran from Tunisia to the Egyptian border, as well as a mass colonial effort of emigrating Italians to settle what was largely a desert wasteland. Later killed, along with an enourage of family and friends, when his plane was shot down by Italian artillery over Tobruk harbor. Probably the victim of his rival’s intense jealousy, although the official explanation ran that he failed to identify himself. May have been fleeing to Egypt to set up a government in exile. Inner: Charismatic, highly competent, and a gifted adept in any sphere he attempted. Saw flying as an aphrodisiac, and a perfect vehicle for his endless self-promotion. Ruthless, restless and highly exuberant. Great need to be constantly admired and the center of attention. Plane crashes usually symbolize a desire to rise to a higher plane in the next go-round. High-flying lifetime of working with longtime ally and cohort, only to be undone by his jealousy over his superior skills. Guiseppe Garibaldi (1807-1882) - Italian general. Outer: From a family of fishermen and coastal traders. Spent some years as a sailor, joining the navy of the kingdom of Piedmont-Sardinia, where he became an ardent patriot, interested in the unification of Italy. Took part in a failed mutiny to that effect, then fled to France when he was condemned to death in absentia by a Genoese court. Spent 12 years in South America, beginning in 1836, as an exile, working as a pirate and revolutionary for the Rio Grande de Sol republic. Eloped with Anita Ribiero (Melanie Griffith) who was married at the time and she became his close consort in all that he did until her death in his arms in 1849, 4 children from union. Tried to be a teacher and commercial traveler, but could not adjust to quiet civilian life. Took up arms for Uruguay, and wound up commanding an Italian Legion, who became the first band of Redshirts, with which his name would be linked. Gained fame as a revolutionary fighter, with his reputation spreading all the way to Europe. In 1848, he, along with Anita, led 60 of his legion back to Italy to fight for the Risorgimento, the reorganization, or reunification of Italy. After the pope turned down his offer to fight for him, as did the king of Piedmont-Sardinia, he went to the city of Milan, and continued fighting even after an armistice with the Austrians was signed. Forced to retreat into exile, he settled down with his wife and children in his hometown of Nice. Returning to Italy, he was elected a deputy in the Roman assembly, and proposed the city should become an independent republic. Also championed women’s emancipation and labor rights, as well as racial equality, although he believed in his heart in dictatorship, and distrusted democratic practices. Served as an inspiration by defending Rome from superior forces, before retreating to the independent republic of San Marino. Fled from pursuit, during which time his beloved wife died, and he made it to safety on the Tuscan coast, by now a hero representing Italian resolve. Went into deeper exile, in Tangier, Staten Island, and then Peru, where he became a ship captain again. Allowed to return to Italy in 1854, he bought part of an island off the Sardinian coast, which would become his permanent home. After a failed expedition, he was made a major general in the Piedmontese army, and scored several martial victories. Hooked up with Piedmont-Sardinian king Victor Emmanuel II, although his desire to unify Italy and the king’s desire to expand his own sovereignty were at odds. Protested in Parliament when Nice was returned to France, then married the daughter of a marchese, only to abandon her within hours of the wedding when he discovered she was pregnant by one of his officers. Several months later, he began his serial conquest of Naples and Sicily without government backing, and gained enormous public backing for his heroism. Handed over southern Italy to Victor Emmanuel, and the meeting of the 2 men signaled a unified Italy in 1861. Asked to govern Naples as the king’s viceroy, but this request was refused since he was viewed as an anticlerical radical by conservative elements in the government, and was also more popular than the king, placing him in opposition to the very ideal he had fought for. Viewed as a martial adept the world over, he began to prepare for an assault on Rome, although he was stopped by government troops, badly wounded in battle and taken prisoner. Freed, but left lame, he went to England, where he was cheered by a monstrous throng in London. Returned and continued fighting, proving his martial expertise once again, before launching on a drive towards Rome in 1867. Defeated, arrested and released, he led one final campaign to assist the French republic against Prussia in the Franco-Prussian War. Distinguished himself once again in a losing cause, then retired to his island home and lived in seclusion, nursing his rheumatism and many wounds. Called himself a socialist at life’s end, although was disavowed by European leaders of that movement, and thought of himself as a pacifist. In his last years, his final relationship and the children from it were legitimatized when his 2nd marriage was nullified. Died full of honor, but an oddly isolated figure, both ahead of and behind his own times. Inner: Brave, completely dedicated, master of guerrilla warfare and the voice of commonality, acting out the underlying spirit of a disconnected Italy. Honest, with little interest in material gain, although a hidden sense of kingship from lives past marred his otherwise exemplary record. His seafaring family indicated a desire to dwell in the realm of the emotions, and his underground, guerrilla activities were also geared towards bringing his complex interior to the surface. Legendary lifetime of reducing himself to his sheer martial sensibilities, operating out of instinct rather than analysis, and performing heroically as the premier nationalist revolutionary of the century, in an attempt to integrate his emotional essence with his outer activities as the exemplar of a can-do unifier. Pasquali Paoli (Felipe Antonio Pasquale di Paoli) (1725-1807) - CCorsican rebel and statesman. Outer: Father was Giacinto Paoli, a rebel leader against Genoese rule in Corsica from the time his son was 9, after an insurrection broke out that would last in one form or another for forty-four years. Younger son, along with two sisters. In 1736, the island’s throne was briefly held by Theodore von Neuhoff (Benito Mussolini), who fled later that year, for lack of funds and support. A series of French interventions ensued, after his progenitor was made one of a trinity of chiefs, which forced his sire into exile to Naples in 1739. Followed him and studied at the Naples Military School, in order to prepare himself for continuing his progenitor’s lifework. Tall, strong, with a fair complexion, an open face, and a manly sense about him. Read widely, while opting for a military life, rather than entering the church, as his father wished him to do. Never married, wedding himself to his cause, instead. Became an ensign in his sire’s regiment of Corsican Refugees. Returned to Corsica in 1755, and was proclaimed, “general of the people,” and elected to executive power under a highly liberal constitution. An enlightened despot, he gave order and justice to Corsica instead of vendetta, while building up his naval fleet, and supporting education with the foundation of a university. Also continued the war against Genoa, and after 1764, Genoa’s ally, France. When France bought Corsica in 1768, it invaded the island and defeated the nationalists the following year. Fled to England, received a pension from the English king and lived in exile in London for the next 2 decades, as a celebrity and hero to many, particularly the English writer James Boswell (Kenneth Tynan). Granted amnesty and made a lieutenant general and military commandant during the French Revolution, he returned to Corsica in 1790, and was appointed president of the Administrative Council and commander of the National Guard, but he wound up opposing the extremism of the Revolution and fell out of favor. Outlawed by the Convention in 1793, he continued the fight for independence, expelling the French the following year with British help. Offered the sovereignty of Corsica to England, which accepted it, although rejected the viceroy, Gilbert Minto (Bantu Holomisa) that was sent, and chose another as his chief adviser. Embittered, but not wishing to cause discord, he retired to England the following year, and lived out his life on a government pension in obscurity. Died at home, while providing in his will for the continuing education of his fellow Corsicans. Inner: Dedicated, dignified, pragmatic, charismatic and highly patriotic. A hero of fellow Corsican, Napoleon Bonaparte, until his fall out with the French government. Uomo di bronzo, man of bronze lifetime of being totally imbued with a cause and dedicating his life’s work to it with mixed results in preparation for a repeat performance in a later go-round in the martial, rather than the political arena, that would make him a world figure. Andrea Doria (1466-1560) - Italian admiral. Outer: Member of an old and illustrious Genoese patrician family, whose parents were related. Orphaned early and became a soldier of fortune in his youth. Served the pope and then other Italian princes, showing himself to be a military adept, before turning to the sea after numerous victories on land. Around 1510, he was appointed captain general of the Genoese galleys, and did successful battle with Barbary pirates. Took service with Francois I (David Lloyd George) in his mid-50s, and was appointed admiral of the French Mediterranean fleet, successfully serving both France and the pope in series of brilliant victories, ultimately turning on his French regent and driving him out of Genoa. Defected to HRE Charles V (Napoleon Bonaparte) and ruler of Genoa, extending the influence of the emperor through the entire peninsula of Italy via his victories. Although he held no official post, he became a dominant figure in Genoese councils, while serving as an Imperial Admiral on the Mediterranean. Won the enmity of numerous factions, and extracted harsh vengeance when his nephew and heir was murdered. Suppressed several plots against him in the late 1550s, but managed to live out a long life of bringing his martial and political will to bear, finally retiring at the age of 89. Left his estates to a grand nephew. Inner: Vain, vindictive, greedy, unscrupulous, unprincipled and cruel, but a highly effective commander, one of the great figures of Mediterranean warfare. All-at-sea lifetime of giving full sway to his military and administrative skills, as well as his dictatorial authority and emotional excess, without succumbing to the unfavorable judgment of others. Konrad IV (1228-1254) - German Holy Roman Emperor. Outer: Son of Friedrich II (Yukio Mishima) and his 2nd wife, Isabella II of Jerusalem (Melanie Griffith). Heir to the kingdom of Jerusalem through his mother. Made duke of Swabia by his father in 1235, and 2 years later, he replaced his much older brother as king of the Romans after his sibling had rebelled against his father. When the pope excommunicated his begetter in 1239, he found himself opposed by a strong papal party in Germany, and in 1245, the next pope deposed both him and his father and declared a crusade against them. Defeated the following year, but maintained some support, while marrying Elisabeth, the daughter of the ruler of Bavaria. Their son, Conrad V (Benito Mussolini), eventually succeeded him. Following his father’s death in 1250, opposition forced him to abandon Germany for Sicily, and in 1251, he took the title of king of that realm. Captured Naples in 1253 to secure his position, but was never able to reconcile with the papacy. Inner: Mixed martial artist, experiencing both victory and loss in battle, while being educated by a sire who was an absolute adept. Learning lifetime of dealing with rebellions against him, in order to become a rebel extraordinaire later on in this series, while also tasting both victory and defeat to temper his ongoing martial artistry. Manuel I Comnenus (c1122-1180) - Byzantine basileus. Outer: Fourth son of John II Comnenus (J. Paul Getty), and the complete opposite of his excessively pious sire. Mother was a Hungarian princess. Joined his father on his campaigns while still a youth, showing an immediate bravado in battle. Tall, dark and outstandingly handsome, with a slight stoop. Through his father’s desire for a political union, married Bertha, the excessively pious daughter of a German count and sister-in-law of the German King Konrad III (Sumner Redstone), without having any overt interest in her, as he continued his seductive ways outside his royal bedchamber. Two daughters from the union. Chosen by his progenitor to succeed him, despite being his youngest son, and did so on his death in 1143, confining his oldest surviving brother to a monastery. Proved extremely generous with both the Church and populace, guaranteeing his popularity, although making the empire financially dependent on the Italian city-states. Made John Axuch commander of the army, and proved victorious in his early forays against the Turks, as well as a recalcitrant crusader prince. Made peace with the Turks, then fortified Constantinople against the Second Crusade, forcing the hordes who descended on his domain to swear fealty to him, in anticipation of their locust-like disregard for everything in their path, while successfully managing their passage through his lands. Concluded a treaty with his father-in-law Konrad against the Normans of Sicily and their leader Roger II (Kathleen Kennedy). Did battle with them, and ultimately prevailed in southern Italy, when it rebelled against the latter’s successor, giving him a great toehold in the bottom of the boot. Able to make an alliance with the pope, because of his extreme pro-western sympathies, while hoping for a restoration of the old Roman Empire, as an adjunct to his. Reversals, however, blunted his hopes, and by 1158, his army was out of Italy, never to return again. Failed in his desire for a union of the eastern and western churches, as well. Following the death of his wife in 1159, whom he mourned far more in her passing than he ever celebrated in life, he married Maria of Antioch (Melanie Griffith). One son from the union, Alexius II (Mehmet Ali Acga), who would briefly succeed him. Continued his aggressive stances, although many of his desires were blunted by unseen circumstances, both in Italy and the northern frontiers. A cousin of his, Andronicus (Benito Mussolini) had earlier conspired against him in 1153, and was imprisoned for it, before breaking out in 1165, to begin his plotting anew, which resulted in realigning himself with the emperor, and joining him in a successful campaign in Hungary, before returning with him to the capital in 1168, only to have another falling-out over his disloyalty, as the latter fled once more to await his time for usurpation. Made an alliance with Amalric I (Harold Alexander) of Jerusalem to try to realize the latter’s dream of controlling Egypt, and with him, invaded that ancient state in 1169, but the venture failed because of a distrust between the two polities. Fared better against the Seljuk Turks for a while, before tactical errors led to a decisive defeat at Myriocephalum, which proved his Waterloo, and his vaunted bravery and self-confidence left him, never to fully return. Began seeking advice from court astrologers, who swore to him he had years of glory left, before he finally saw his run was at an end. Donned a monk’s habit, and died soon afterwards of a fever. Although he would receive more than his share of praise for his accomplishments, none of his victories would consolidate the Empire’s standing in its contemporary world, because of his lack of focus on what Byzantium truly needed to maintain its territorial hold in the east. Far too generous as well, in his outlays in his diplomatic dealings, which depleted the empire’s treasury, leaving it in a highly vulnerable state for his successors. Inner: Charming, informal, lighthearted and endlessly seductive, with a never-satiated appetite for the opposite sex. Far more western than any of his predecessors, and always looking for new conquests, without seeing a larger pattern to his imperialistic designs. The possessor of a huge rage, which often tempered his decision-making. Never particularly popular among his own people, because of his western ways, despite being extremely well-liked by those who knew him personally. Had a great love of pleasure, as well as a genuine love of life, but was too much an of an adventurer to be a top tier general. Brio-filled lifetime of serving as a bridge of sorts between east and west, without having the vision to truly alter and illuminate his times.


Storyline: The self-battering belle plays with both inhibitions and exhibitionism as she circles round her various vulnerabilities, alternately playing hide’n’seek with herself, to see what ultimately emerges.

Melanie Griffith (Melanie Richards Griffith) (1957) - American actress. Outer: Of northern European descent on her mother’s side, and English on her father’s. Daughter of actress Tippi Hedren. Father was a real estate developer, and she was initially raised on a ranch outside of Los Angeles. Her parents divorced when she was 4, after her mother moved to Hollywood. Both progenitors remarried, and she was added to their other broods, leaving her feeling very insecure. Modeled at 9 months, and appeared as an extra in her mother’s films, falling in love with the former’s co-star, Don Johnson, and moved in with him at the age of 15. Made her film debut in 1975 in Night Moves, which would result in her playing over-exposed nymphets in any of her subsequent films. 5’9” and voluptuous. Married Johnson in 1976, and the two lived a libidinous lifestyle, splitting up several months later. Decided to take her craft more seriously, and studied with Stella Adler in NY, before re-emerging in the early 1980s as an actress capable of both fey comedy and believable drama. Her successes and subsequent failures, however, were laced with drug and alcohol abuse, and feelings of worthlessness. Married actor Steven Bauer in 1983, one son the from union, divorced in 1985. Learned more discipline as an actress, and had a break-though in 1984 with Body Double, although she still pursued a self-destructive course, particularly after her second divorce. In 1988, she went into a drug and rehabilitation center in Minnesota, and was able to conquer herself, with the long distance support of Johnson. Married him again in 1989, but once again parted ways in 1989. Their daughter Dakota, from the second go-round became an actress. Through therapy, she began to see how she lost herself in relationships, and finally took control over her life. After appearing with him in Two Much, she married Spanish actor Antonio Banderas in 1996, one daughter from the union, as she made the transition to more mature roles, proving herself an actress of both versatility and depth, while still retaining a little girl quality to many of her portrayals. Most importantly, she was able to love herself, a great breakthrough for her, after many a go-round of struggling with the same theme. Appeared with the Old Vic in London in 1999 in “The Vagina Monologues,” then hit Broadway to mixed reviews in 2003 in a reprise of Chicago, playing star Roxie Hart, breaking house attendance records in the process. In 2005, she entered the ranks of series TV, with “Twins,” and has continued to focus on the small, rather than the large screen. Along with her husband, is known for her charity work. Continued suffering for her addictions, with more rehab stints for pain pills late in the decade, in her ongoing battles with herself. Ultimately filed for divorce in 2014, ending her 18 year marriage, while citing irreconcilable differences twixt the two. Later revealed she had epileptic seizures, which stopped abruptly when the duo divorced. Has a net worth of $20 million. Inner: Well-liked, natural, and earthy with an addictive personality. Someone a lot of Hollywood was rooting for, in her time of troubles. Healing lifetime of confronting her demons of self-dislike and learning to get past them, to finally integrate herself around life and love, only to ultimately fall victim once again to Two Much. Carole Landis (Frances Ridste) (1919-1948) - American actress. Outer: Father was Norwegian, mother was of Polish extraction. Both were immigrants who spoke little English, sire was a railroad mechanic. Older brother and sister. Began competing in beauty contests at the age of 12, and soon developed into a voluptuous, busty young woman. 5’9”. Eloped with a writer at the age of 15, although the union only lasted 3 weeks. Worked as a milliner, usherette and waitress, before heading for San Francisco at 16, where she was a singer and hula dancer in one of the city’s plusher nightclubs. 2 years later, she brought ‘the best legs in town,’ to Hollywood, and immediately found filmwork, beginning with the original A Star is Born. By her early 20s she was the star of several eminently forgettable films, then continued an active but largely superficial career while marrying 3 more times, including a Broadway producer. Had many lovers, and was eventually found dead of an overdose of Seconal sleeping pills, after a break-up with suave English actor, Rex Harrison, who discovered her body, lying on the floor clutching a jewel box. Left a suicide note to her mother. Inner: Vulnerable voluptuary. Always looking for a strong mate to complete her, while feeling an emptiness on her own. Shallow lifetime of playing off of her lush looks in trying to find love, although found only lust in the hearts of her many partners, necessitating a confused search for self-worth the next time around, as well. Myrtle Gonzalez (1891-1918) - American actress. Outer: Little known about her, but her odd combination of names, the first rural American, and the second Latina, make her a figure who was probably trying to integrate two cultures. Enjoyed a run as a star of popular outdoor adventures in 1916 and 1917, making some 34 films during that time. The following year, she died of heart disease and pneumonia, despite only being 27. Inner: Vulnerable heart and early death make her the perfect antecedent for her next two lives, in which she acts out her problems, and then resolves them in a neat thesis, antithesis and synthesis of repeat performances. Flickering lifetime of setting the foundation of a classic equation of love searched for, lost and gained. Anita Garibaldi (Anita Maria de Jesus Ribeiro da Silva) (1821-1849) - Revolutionary helpmate. Outer: From a poor Brazilian family of fishermen and herdsmen, at a time when Brazil was still under the monarchical thumb of Portugal. Her father abandoned the family, and she was raised by her mother. Grew up in very physical environs, and was an excellent athlete, and a skilled rider, as well as quite comely. When she was 14, she married. 3 years later, however, she left her husband and joined Guiseppe Garibaldi (Antonio Banderas), an Italian revolutionary, living in exile, and struggling to make southern Brazil a separatist republic. She soon was fighting side-by-side with him, mirroring his courage and tenacity, while acting out her own la pasionara fantasies. Taught Garibaldi the gaucho way of his stranger-in-a-strange-land environs, and 1841, they moved to Montevideo in Uruguay, where they married the following year, 4 children from union. In between children, she took part in Garibaldi’s 1847 defense of Montevideo against Argentina. The following year, she accompanied him back to Italy, to take advantage of the continent-wide revolutions of 1848. Joined her spouse in the defense of Rome in 1849, although it fell to a French seige, and she was forced to flee. Pregnant with her 5th child and sick, she died in her husband’s arms later that year to his everlasting grief. Inner: Feisty, passionate and fecund. All-out lifetime of high adventure and romance, only to undo herself through a disregard of what her body could bear, in her ongoing struggles with truly knowing herself and what her strengths and limits are, a conundrum she would not begin to solve until several go-rounds later. Isabella II (Yolanda) (1212-1228) - Queen of Jerusalem. Outer: Only child of John of Brienne (Ashton Kutcher) and Maria of Montserrat (Sean Young), the reigning king and queen of Jerusalem. Her mother died in giving birth to her, and she became queen of Jerusalem as an infant, with her father acting as regent until 1225. That year, she married Friederich II (Yukio Mishima), the Holy Roman Emperor, in the hope of the pope, that the union would elicit the latter’s participation in the Sixth Crusade. Her husband, however, had other plans, and immediately began to lay claim to her kingdom, much to her father’s consternation. He also kept a large harem, living like an eastern potentate, relegating her to a very secondary role. Died giving birth to their son, Konrad (Antonio Banderas). Inner: Foreshortened life of largely being a powerless pawn, despite her royal status, in yet another early exit go-round, in her own ongoing struggles with self-worth. Marie of Antioch (1145-1182) - Byzantine empress. Outer: Father was a transplanted French count of Antioch who died when she was young. Mother, Constance of Antioch, was an intriguer who wished the principality of Antioch for herself. Younger sister of Melisande, who was the original intended bride for Manuel I Comnenus (Antonio Banderas), although he was bothered by all the political intrigue of her house, and selected her instead, which caused her outraged brother to attack Byzantine-held Cyprus. Like her sibling, a tall, blonde-haired beauty. The duo were married in 1161, in what would prove to be a happy union, with one son, Alexius II (Mehmet Ali Acga), who would briefly follow his father onto the throne. The political offshoots of the marriage were positive for all concerned, from her mother’s regency in Antioch, to the emperor’s relationship with the crusader states. Took an active part in court life, and, when her husband predeceased her in 1180, she became a nun, taking on the name Xene, while acting as regent for her son, the first Latin ever to rule in Constantinople. Despite being veiled, she took on a nephew of Manuel and uncle of the queen of Jerusalem, Alexius, as both her lover and adviser, much to the shock of some of the population, while deliberately excluding her son from any decision-making. Dubbed ‘the foreigner,’ her pro-western stances and largely inept rule, particularly in regard to Italian merchants, deflated her regency, and the city suffered a massacre, when her husband’s cousin, Andonicus (Benito Mussolini) marched on Constantinople and slaughtered much of its Italian citizenry before arresting her, and then having her son sign the order for her execution. When her assigned executioners refused to kill her, she was strangled by court officials and buried in an unmarked grave. Her son was soon murdered by the rapacious Andronicus, who assumed the throne for himself, and as a concluding desire to completely obliterate her memory, destroyed most of her images in the city. Inner: Very much into power and far more westernized than her Grecian constituency, making her extremely unpopular once her heroic husband died. Stranger in a strange land lifetime of uniting with her longtime partner only to find herself extremely vulnerable to a violent overthrow once she publicly stepped out from his protective shadow.


Storyline: The innocent instrument of universal fantasies finds her little girl wholesomeness ultimately corrupted by the wasting hand of time and dis-ease, forcing her to do battle with her basic sense of existence.

Annette Funicello (1942-2013) - American actress and spokeswoman. Outer: From a close family. Grandparents were Italian immigrants. Father was an auto mechanic. Raised Roman Catholic as the oldest of three with two younger brothers. Her family came to California in 1946 to escape cold winters, after her sire sold his business. Shy as a child, her mother had her take dance lessons, and she was seen by Walt Disney at a recital, who cast her as the 24th and last Mouseketeer on his ‘Mickey Mouse Club,’ an extremely popular children’s TV show of the mid-1950s. An audience favorite, she was schooled on the lot and appeared in her own series, as the only Mouseketeer to remain under contract with Disney, who licensed a host of products under her name. Grew into a busty young teenager and began appearing in Disney features, beginning with Johnny Tremaine in 1957, before graduating to a string of 7 beach party movies, costarring Frankie Avalon, in which her lissome figure was always shown to best, but demure, advantage in a swimsuit, under the proviso by Disney that she not show her belly button. 5’3”. Also had 2 hit records in the late 1950s and early 1960s, despite a profound dislike of singing. Made 17 albums all told. In 1965, she married her agent, Jack Gilardi, a daughter and two sons from the union. Always close with Uncle Walt, whom she called Mr. Disney, and probably saw her overdeveloped innocence as his ideal woman. Her limited skills eventually ended her film career by her mid-20s, and she wound up doing TV commercials. Divorced in 1983, she was forced to deal with money matters for the first time in her life, after having been taken care of by parents, studio and husband her whole existence. In 1986, she married Glen Holt, a horse trainer. Reprised her earlier hits in 1987, with Back to the Beach, at which time she discovered she had multiple sclerosis, although kept it a secret for 5 years. In 1992, she went public with her wasting malady, while serving in middle-age as a totem of survival, despite ultimately being wheelchair bound and blind. Used a percentage of the profits of a perfume she developed, ‘Cello,’ for an eponymous fund for neurological diseases. Wrote her autobiography, “A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes,” in 1994. In 2011, a fire gutted her home and she moved with her husband to Bakersfield, where she died in a hospital two years later from complications from multiple sclerosis. Inner: Perky, wholesome, caring, pleasant and forever emblazoned in her audience’s mind as a little girl and spunky teen, making her later struggles with age and dis-ease all the more poignant. Alice in limbo lifetime of continued connection with the ongoing Disney phenomenon, while finding her wonderland turned nightmarish through her nervous predisposition for heavyweight drama in what seemed like a lightweight existence. Alice Liddell (1862-1934) - English literary inspiration. Outer: Father was the dean of Christ Church College at Oxford, and headmaster of the Westminster School at the time of his daughter’s birth. Her mother was a famous beauty, as well as a hostess of note, bringing many eminent Victorians, including the queen herself, to her musical soirees and dinner parties in her husband’s deanery, while her sire was believed to be in love with one his colleagues. 3rd child of 10, two brothers would die young. Middle of 3 sisters, and distant relative of Elizabeth I (Mae West). Educated at home by a governess, while also receiving art instruction from John Ruskin (Kenneth Tynan). Became friends at a young age with Charles Dodgson, better known as Lewis Carroll (Walt Disney), who used her as his inspiration for the classic “Alice in Wonderland,” channeling the story to her and her sisters one day on a boat ride on the river Isis near the college. Became his ideal little woman, often photographing her, while projecting on her his idealism about child/women. Her mother, however, saw him as a potential pervert, when he mentioned possible marriage possibilities as she grew older, and put a stop to their unhealthy relationship. A mysterious incident in the summer of 1863 might have speeded the break, and he lost interest and eventually contact with her as she blossomed into a young woman. Went on to a life of her own, although at life’s near-end, long after he was gone, she was celebrated as his inspiration. In 1872, she was romanced by Prince Leopold, 4th in line to the British throne, but her mother kiboshed the relationship. In 1880, she married Reginald Hargreaves, the sporting scion of a wealthy family, who was an undistinguished scholar and had also been a student of Dogson’s. Lived at his family home, Cuffnells, a Georgian mansion on a 160 acre estate. 3 sons from the union, with two dying in WW I. Emulated her mother as a hostess, throwing grand parties, although largely lived a conventional life. After her husband’s death in 1926, she was forced to sell the original ‘Alice’ mss. for nearly $75,000, while her youngest son inherited the family estate. Allowed to live there, in a lonely existence that saw her berating her servants and criticizing her son’s extravagance and choice of a widow for a wife. Traveled to the U.S. in 1932 for a Lewis Carroll Centenary, although admitted during it she was tired of being Alice in Wonderland. Painted and published her memoirs and died at Cuffnells, which went into further decline afterwards and had to be demolished following WW II. Inner: Modestly expressive, but eventually totally out-of-sorts with what life had dealt her, despite a highly privileged existence and early access to many of the lionized personalities of her times. Iconized lifetime of serving as a literary and artistic focus for a highly repressed soul as a child, and then going on to lead an unexceptional, and ultimately quite lonely, life of her times, with her special legacy from childhood as her singular call to uniqueness. Maria Anna (1635-1696) - Austrian Queen of Spain. Outer: Father was HRE Ferdinand III (Andrew Lloyd Weber), mother was the daughter of the king of Spain. At 13, she married her cousin, Felipe IV (Walt Disney), the king of Spain, after initially being the intended for his son, a figure of some promise, who had died prematurely. 3 sons and 3 daughters from union, including her husband’s successor, the unfortunate Carlos II (Benecio Del Toro), a feeble-minded outgrowth of their incestuous link-up. The king had specifically married her to provide for his succession, but the close degree of their bloodlink caused most of their offspring to die in infancy or at birth. Outlived her mate by more than 3 decades, and presumably led a corseted existence that was unrelieved by any maternal sense through the genetic dysfunction of her offspring. Inner: Pawn-of-greater-powers lifetime of doing her duty, after being stripped of a potentially far more appealing mate by the hand of the fates, to wind up as maternal muse for her longtime father figure.


Storyline: The odd duck alternates between passive piety and absolute autocratic control in creating his white-gloved wonderlands, while evincing a mickey mouse character given to extremes in all that he undertakes with his unusual, but highly eccentric intelligence.

Walt Disney ((Walter Elias Disney) (1901-1966) - American producer, animator and entrepreneur. Outer: Some mystery surrounds his birth, since his official birth certificate was never unearthed. Possibly born in Spain under the name Jose Luis Girao to an attractive washerwoman who brought him to the United States, and passed him on to his father, whom she met while both were in California. Disturbed his entire life over his adoption. His second family gave him Irish and British descent on his paternal side, and British, German and some Scottish on his maternal. Disliked his nasty progenitor, who rarely spared the rod, and was forever fretting over money, and left home as soon as he could. Enrolled at the Kansas City Art Institute at the age of 14, and 2 years later he volunteered as an ambulance driver in France during the last months of WW I. 5’10”. After returning to the U.S., he went to work for a commercial art studio in Kansas City, meeting Ub Iwerks, who became a lifelong animation collaborator. The two created Laugh-O-Grams, a series of animated cartoons that they sold to local theaters. Formed his own production company, under the same name, but went bankrupt, and headed for Hollywood. Teaming with his brother Roy, who handled his business affairs, he produced a combination of animation and live action works under the banner of Alice in Cartoonland. Married Lillian Bounds in 1925, 2 daughters from the union. In 1927, with Iwerks, he created Oswald the Rabbit, and the following year, the immortal Mickey Mouse, who made his initial bow in silence. Ever the technical innovator, he quickly added sound to the mix, with Steamboat Willie. His team of animators followed these early successes with his "Silly Symphony" series, integrating music with his animation, by drawing to the musical beat. Suffered a mental breakdown in 1931, and was largely reclusive for most of the rest of his life. By the mid-1930s, Mickey Mouse and his fellow stable of cartoon stars had become an industry unto themselves, with watches and trains bearing their features, while giving Depression-era America a much needed escape from its economic woes through his unique combination of sentimentality and brilliant technical innovation. The animation factory that he created would go on to compose the first feature length cartoon, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs in 1937, and then bring to life his controversial attempt at wedding classical music and animation in Fantasia in 1940, which was beyond the public of the time. Liked to be known as ‘Uncle Walt,’ although fairly frothed at the mouth when his animators went on strike in 1941. Just about all who worked for him had a love/hate relationship with him for his authoritarian and demanding ways. A kid at heart, he built a half-mile of miniature rail/lines in his backyard. During WW II, the Disney studio did both training and propaganda films for the American war effort, and afterwards he showed himself to be a rabid anti-communist. In 1950, he enlarged his operation to include live action features as well as animation, and the following year, using 13 writers, he made the feature-length cartoon, Alice in Wonderland, unconsciously tapping into his previous go-round. The Disney Studios became synonymous with clean, wholesome family entertainment, expanding to television during the early part of that decade, and then in 1955, producing a longheld dream, Disneyland in Southern California, a theme park that would give 4 dimensions to his vision of a thoroughly integrated entertainment company. Loved and revered by millions through his TV appearances as the avuncular host of his own eponymous show, he eventually died of an acute circulatory collapse after surgery for the removal of a lung tumor, after being a heavy life-long smoker. Just before he went, he mysteriously scribbled the name Kurt Russell, who was a child star at his studio at the time, on a piece of paper, although no one knows why. Perhaps it was one final desire for eternal youth. Supposedly had his body cryogenically frozen afterwards, although in actuality he was cremated. Asked what he was proudest of, he stated, “The whole damn thing, the fact that I was able to build an organization and hold it.” Inner: Highly controlling, with a genius for grounding his childlike imagination. Dualistic, lukewarm family man, yet authoritarian hands-on patriarch with his studio. Withdrawn, suspicious and controlling, an odd combination of piety and technology. Largely friendless, and extremely prudish to the point of puritanical, despite a fascination with defecation. A serially obsessive workaholic, totally throwing himself into each of his projects, and abandoning people when they no longer served his purposes. The possessor of a huge ego, had his name on everything he produced. Secret drinker, also suffered several breakdowns. Empire-building lifetime of exploring his masculine side in an ongoing attempt at integrated his extremely active imagination with technology and popular tastes, leaving a rich legacy of work and a persona that never matched his purity of vision, while, in a sense, bringing his previous existence to its adolescent maturity. Lewis Carroll (Charles Lutwidge Dodgson) (1832-1898) - English mathematician, teacher and storyteller. Outer: Father was a country curate who ultimately became a rector and archdeacon elsewhere. 3rd of 11 children, including 7 sisters, and 3 younger brothers. Grew up in a genteel, largely female household, where he entertained his siblings with his fey imagination, while expressing his religiosity through a devout sense of Anglicanism. When he was 12, the family moved to Croft, and he put his creative energies into the family magazine. Attended Rugby, where he was bullied and which he disliked, ultimately losing the hearing in one ear through illness. Was far more successful at Christ Church, Oxford, where he would spend the rest of his life as a lecturer and fellow. Despite a bad stammer, he was ultimately able to preach effectively late in life. Never married, he was generally shy, chaste and prudish, although he had a special love for little girls, with whom he never stammered. When he was in his early 30s, while trolling down the Isis River with the daughters of his dean and a compatriot, he channeled a classical book of the dead, “Alice in Wonderland,” which saw print 3 years later and became a literary phenomenon. A sequel, “Through the Looking Glass,” was published 6 years later. The original Alice, Alice Liddell (Annette Funicello), was one of the daughters of the dean. She would also be his ideal child/woman in his next life. Once hinted to her mother that he would like to marry her when she came of age, at which point, the latter angrily broke off relations between them and burned all his letters. Extremely picky and difficult to please with the artists chosen to illustrate his works. Found his pen name by translating his real name into Latin, Carolus Ludovicus, and then transposing it. Wrote several nonsense verses which also achieved acclaim, as well as serious mathematical treatises. Also an artist, albeit limited in his abilities, despite having taken drawing lessons. An accomplished photographer, particularly when limning naked little girls, although his own fears surrounding impropriety and public judgment, stopped him from further pursuing his aesthetic interest in their nude form. Spent his last years writing and adhering to routines and embroiling himself in meaningless academic quarrels before dying of influenza. Inner: Childlike in his own enthusiasms, had great difficulty sleeping, only getting a few hours a night, and led a completely blameless, and largely uneventful life, dedicated to the pleasures of the mind, and not the body. Loved the theater, endlessly inventive around games, with a special interest in doing magic tricks for children. Highly intelligent, with a logical and nonsensical mind all wrapped in one repressed Victorian package. Virginal lifetime of not daring to dip into his deep unconscious, but instead, surfing over his own surface imagination to create a timeless epic, while keeping his own darker drives hidden even from himself, and remaining, in essence, a child his entire existence. Jean-Baptiste Oudry (1686-1755) - French artist. Outer: Father was a painter and art dealer as well as an art school director, and became his son’s first teacher. Mother was the daughter of an engraver. Younger of 3 painter brothers. Became a pupil of society portrait painter Nicolas de Largilliere, through whom he made many social connections and joined the Academy of St. Luke 1708, eventually rising to a professorship there in 1717. In 1709, he married Marie-Marguerite Froissé, the daughter of a mirror-maker, his son Jacques-Charles Oudry, also became a painter. Initially worked in a sentimental Rococco style. Made a member of the French Academie Royale in 1719, where he began focusing on animal portraits, for which he is best remembered. Began designing tapestries in 1726, and became the director of the Beauvais tapestry works in 1734. 2 years later, he was appointed director of the royal Gobelins works, and became very wealthy in the process. As supervisor, he had considerable influence on the decorative arts of France. Specialized in the painting of hunting scenes, animals and still lives, while maintaining a large studio and employing many assistants. Did book illustrations and was often called to Versailles, where he would paint on order in front of the king. Also worked for foreign royalty. His best known work was “The White Duck.” His industry was so great during the last 2 decades of his painting life, that some question arose as to whether he merely signed his students’ works, although his fascination with light and reflections remains consistent in all of them. Suffered two apocalyptic attacks, and was left paralyzed by the second, and expired shortly thereafter. Inner: Extremely industrious, employed the camera obscura for form, although later realized its drawbacks in his attention to light and shadow. Despite modest birth, felt at ease with royalty. Transition lifetime of moving on from aristocratic rule to creative expression, while finding his depth of aesthetic interest in animals rather than his fellow humans. Felipe IV (1605-1665) - Spanish king. Outer: Eldest son of Felipe III (Ehud Olmert). Mother was the daughter of an Austrian duke. Had a dwarf as his most trusted companion while growing up. Succeeded to the throne at the age of 16. Content to leave affairs of state with his serial favorites, including the Duke of Olivares (Michael Ovitz), who helped make his court a cultural center for the first half of his reign. Affected a regal bearing in public, and it was said that he was only seen to laugh 3 times in his life. Married at 10 to Elisabeth de Bourbon, the daughter of Henri IV of France (FDR) and Marie de’ Medicis (Sara Roosevelt), 8 children from union, although most died in infancy. After his wife passed in 1644, he married his niece Maria Anna (Annette Funicello) in 1649, who was 30 years his junior and the daughter of the Holy Roman Emperor Ferdinand III (Andrew Lloyd Weber), 6 children, most of whom also died in infancy, save for his successor, Carlos II (Benecio Del Toro), a drooling product of incest who was incapable of rule. Followed proscribed rituals every moment of the day, so that he was a prisoner of royal rote. A patron of the arts, while his family was continually painted by Diego Velazquez (Diego Rivera), leaving a high artistic record of his court, thanks to the warts’n’all talent of the latter. A poet, as well as patron of masques, pageants and poetry, he, nevertheless, permitted Spain to decline as a world power under his rule, allowing his house to finally end its 225 rule under his imbecile son. Became a relative recluse toward the end of his reign, and the last 4 years saw him frequently relying on the advice of a mystic nun. By the time he died, his magical kingdom was a 2nd-class power. Inner: Liked everything to be done with the maximum decorum. Possessed an innate native wit and intellectual curiosity, although lacked the self-confidence to fully take the reigns of government. Enjoyed hunting and horsemanship, although showed little real interest in affairs of state. Literature and art flourished under his strong aesthetic sensibilities, but his unintegrated character could not function as an effective ruler. Corseted lifetime of realizing his deficiencies as a leader, while underscoring the fact that his real rulership lay in the creative realm, giving him an impetus to continue in this vein in his later lives in this series, as a channel and emperor of magical kingdoms. Amalric II (c1145-1205) - French king of the Latin Kingdom of Jerusalem and Cyprus. Outer: Father was the count of Lusignan, who had been an early crusader. Younger brother of Guy de Lusignan (Desi Arnaz). After waylaying and killing an English earl on his way back from pilgrimage, along with his brothers, he wound up banished for the deed, as did they. Made his way to the Holy Land by 1174, and married Eschive d'Ibelin, the daughter of a noble, 6 children from the union,the daughter of a noble, 6 children from union, half of whom died young. Ingratiated himself into the royal court, and took service with Agnes (Mary Pickford), the widow of Amalric I (Harold Alexander), and mother of Baldwin IV (Benecio Del Toro), the leper-king of Jerusalem. His brother, Guy, soon joined him, and in 1179, he became constable of Palestine. The following year, Guy married Sibylla (Lucille Ball), the king’s older sister, and in 1186, his Sibylla-wed sibling became king, largely through the efforts of his wife. In the disastrous battle of Hattin, which made the throne a largely empty affair, he and his brother were both captured. Guy eventually was awarded the kingship of Cyprus in a trade-off, and following the death of the former, he was summoned to Cyprus by their nobles to succeed him as king there in 1194. Also betrothed his three sons to the three daughters of Henri de Champagne (Robert Downey, Jr.) the nominal king of Jerusalem, while becoming a vassal of the HRE Heinrich VI (Jean Paul Getty). Following Henri’s accidental death in 1197, and the death of his own wife, he married his widow Isabella (Diane Keaton) as her fourth and final husband, and the following year, he became king of Jerusalem as well, although at this juncture, the Latin Kingdom of Jerusalem was only a narrow strip of land, having been eaten away by the successful forays of the Egyptian sultan Saladin (David Sarnoff). 3 children from union. Saw himself as a regent, rather than king over the kingdom, and ruled it accordingly, making peace with his Muslim neighbors, since they were still sorting out territorial claims following the death of Saladin in 1193. Though the treaty twixt the two sides would be occasionally broken, he managed to renew it in 1204. On his death from dysentery following a “surfeit of white mullet,”, his son, Hugh, succeeded him as king of Cyprus, while Isabella, who followed him in death shortly afterwards, retained the throne of Jerusalem, and passed it down to her daughter, Maria of Montferrat (Sean Young). Inner: Competent and largely colorless. Opportunist lifetime of taking advantage of everything thrown his way, and acquitting himself capably without leaving any distinctive mark on anything he did.


Storyline: The crypto-aristo turns in his ruling class togs for a loincloth, for a much freer go-round of self-expression, unimpeded by concerns of state, and the need to reflect them, preferring to be an emperor with no clothes, in the primitive country of everyone’s imagination.

Johnny Weissmuller (Janos Weissmuller) (1904-1984) - Romanian/American actor and athlete. Outer: Parents were Hungarian nationals who immigrated to America when he was 3, and his father became a brewmaster. One younger brother who was also a good athlete. The studios would later fudge on his origins, to try to make him into a native-born star, and the deception also allowed him to represent the U.S. in the Olympics, when he used his brother’s birthdate to insure his eligibility. Sickly as a child, he took up swimming on the advice of a doctor. Only went as far as the 8th grade in school, dropping out shortly before his father’s premature death, but was trained in swimming at the Illinois Athletic Club in Chicago, while working as a bellhop and elevator operator at Chicago’s Plaza hotel. 6’3”, 190 lbs. and muscular, he proved himself of champion caliber in both team relay and water polo sports, as well as individual freestyle, winning a host of races throughout the 1920s, ultimately holding 67 world and 52 national titles, thanks to a unique six beat leg kick to every double stroke of his arms, which kept him high in the water and reduced its drag on his speed. In 1924, he won three gold medals for freestyle and as part of the 800-meter relay team. Also won a Bronze medal as a member of the U.S. water polo team. After appearing in some swimming extravaganzas, as well as some shorts, he was approached by MGM for a potential jungle series. Easily able to translate his athletic fame into a muscular movie career, where he became identified with the character of Tarzan of the Apes, starring in nearly twenty of the vehicles between 1932 and 1949, beginning with Tarzan the Apeman, where he would display his large frame in a loin cloth, and usually perform some swimming feat, while periodically giving out his patented jungle cries. Thoroughly enjoyed the role, since it did not tax him in the slightest, nor did it demand anything beyond rudimentary “Me Tarzan, you Jane,” dialogue. After two brief unions, to Camille Louiee and Bobbe Arnst, a musical comedy actress, in 1933, he married for the third time to Mexican actress Lupe Velez (Gloria Trevi), and their 5 year relationship would be sheer public theater, thanks to the media of the time’s fascination with her meltdowns, although he was also capable of violent reaction to her. Often had to resort to make-up to cover her scratch and bite marks on his body. Following their divorce, he married again in 1939, to Beryl Scott, a San Francisco socialite, whom he divorced in 1948. This union would produce his three children, two daughters and a son, who died in a car crash at 19 in 1962. Married again to Ailene Gates, a golfer, in 1948, divorced in 1962. After the public began to tire of Tarzan, he switched studios, and created the character of Jungle Jim, a guide discreetly clad in safari togs, which he played on film until 1955, and later on TV, beginning in 1958, appearing on screen only once more in a cameo. Had a number of businesses that used his name in conjunction with their products, although he proved far less successful in the real world than the reel one. Married for the 6th and last time in 1963, with his final union, to Maria Bauman, a Bavarian native, the only one that truly lasted. Wrote his autobiography, “Water, World and Weissmuller,” in 1967. Broke his hip and leg in 1974, and discovered he had a serious heart condition, before suffering a series of strokes in 1977, making him an invalid for his last 5 years. Died of heart disease at home. Inner: Simple, sensual and seductive, casual and carefree, a natural man’s man, attracted to passionate, emotional women. Nature boy lifetime of being given free expression to embody handsome physicality, as an emblem of glorious athletic innocence, in a realm that demanded little of him, save staying in shape. Alexander III (1845-1894) - Russian tsar. Outer: 2nd son of Alexander II (Steven Spielberg). Mother was Marie Alexandrovna (Jennnifer Lawrence), a German princess. Raised as a soldier, he never thought he would rule, and was totally untrained for it. Large, powerful, unworldly and muscular, he was able to straighten horseshoes with his bare hands. Also morbidly shy, conscious of his own empty interior. Given a deep sense of right and wrong by his tutors, which provided him with a totally black-and-white view of the world. In 1865, his older brother, Nikolai (David Hasselhoff), died of tuberculosis, and per the latter’s deathbed wish, he married his sibling’s fiancee, Marie (Britt Ekland), a Danish princess, the following year. The union was a happy one, producing 5 children, including his heir Nicholas II (Lex Barker), who feared him. Only Romanov ruler who did not have a mistress or lover his entire life. Began his education anew when he became heir presumptive, although he could not see beyond the autocracy of the throne and nationalism of the state. Shunned pomp and ostentation and lived quite simply. Brought into the government at 21 by his father, and soon began to oppose his sire’s reforms. Assumed the throne on the assassination of his father in 1881, and proved to be uncompromising, blunt and crude, an intransigent leader with little understanding of the true nature of his people. Extremely dutiful, he read each report given him, and guarded every kopeck as if it were his own. His reign stood as the last desperate attempt at maintaining autocracy. Full of vigor at its outset, he thought he was heaven-sent to quell the country’s revolutionary ardor as the champion of rigid orthodoxy and Russophile extremism. In the spring of 1894, he began to suffer from nephritis, a kidney disease, having taken on the poisons of his country, without being able to release them. Died later in the year, leaving his state seemingly stable on the surface, as he had been, but wracked with the poison of revolution and upheaval just below. Succeeded by his ill-prepared son, Nicholas II, under whom his line would finally fall. Inner: Dull, slow, rough-hewn and parochial. Stubborn, temperamentally frigid. Had no aspirations other than to do the duty thrust upon him. Recalcitrant lifetime of literally stepping into his far more talented brother’s shoes in order to test his obdurateness against rapidly changing times. Carlos IV (1748-1819) - King of Spain. Outer: From the House of Bourbon. 2nd son of 12 children of future Spanish king Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher) and Maria Amalia (Dakota Johnson), the eldest daughter of the King of Poland, who died when he was 12. Raised in the Kingdom of the Two Sicilies, until his father ascended the throne of Spain in 1759. His older brother was a drooling imbecile, while he was always deemed mentally backward. The possessor of extraordinary strength on a large body, he enjoyed wrestling as a youth with any and all challengers, although his slow wit did little to inspire anyone around his other abilities. In 1765, he married his cousin Marie-Luisa (Gloria Trevi), who would go on to thoroughly dominate him. Fourteen children from the union, although several were probably the result of her illicit liaison with his chief minister Manuel Godoy. Only half would reach adulthood, while his eldest son, Ferdinand VII, would eventually succeed him, after the crown of Spain was restored to his House, following the fall of Napoleon Bonaparte, who had usurped it for his brother Joseph (Joachim von Ribbentrop). Succeeded to the throne on his father’s death in 1788, inheriting a stable kingdom, but fell prey to his wife’s manipulations, thanks in large part, to his subsequent fears of the excesses of the French Revolution. Supported Godoy from 1792 onwards, while remaining largely in the background, although he invoked the Inquisition to stem any reformist sentiments at the court. Believed strongly in the divine right of kings, and was far more interested in appearances than actualities, seeing himself as a holy vessel for rule, without having the compunction to truly act on it. Allied himself with France during the early part of the Napoleonic era, then switched sides, before Godoy leaned back towards France, which proved an unpopular move. His son, Ferdinand, favored an alliance with Great Britain, forcing him to choose to back his minister, which occasioned an uprising, in 1808, and he was forced to abdicate. The throne was usurped by Ferdinand, then grabbed by Napoleon, who gave it to his brother Joseph (Joachim von Ribbentrop), who proved extremely unpopular, but he was in no position to reclaim it. Instead, he went into exile in France, as the prisoner of Napoleon, while feeling totally betrayed by his son. Accepted a pension from the emperor, then after his fall in 1814, his son ascended the throne as Ferdinand VII. Spent the rest of his life in exile, eventually dying two and a half weeks after his wife. Inner: Seen as a good-natured dolt. Dimbulb lifetime of being cuckolded, dethroned and disrespected, causing him to try one more throne, with a more supportive mate, in order to exhaust his desire to rule. Michael III (840-867) - Byzantine Basileus. Outer: Youngest of seven children, and second son of Byzantine emperor Theophilos (Steven Spielberg) and the empress Theodora. His older brother had died before he was born, making him heir apparent at his sire’s death in 842, after being crowned co-emperor shortly after his birth. His mother would serve as his regent, along with the eunuch court official Theoctistus, until he reached the age of 15. During her time of rule, she reinstituted the veneration of relics and icons, while proving a steady hand at the tiller. Nevertheless, she completely neglected her son’s education, allowing him to drift into pleasure-seeking and sensuality without any overt inclination or interest in rule, but rather an overwhelming predisposition towards altered states through alcohol, ultimately winning him the sobriquet of “the drunkard.” Closely connected with his mistress, Eurokia Ingerina (Gloria Trevi), although his mother disapproved of her, and instead, selected Eudokia Dekapoitissa as his bride, after a beauty contest of sorts called a bride-show, that had become a traditional way for emperors to find their mates. The unhappy union, however, proved childless, since he showed absolutely no interest in her. Easily dominated by others, he fell under the spell of his uncle Bardas, who, with his complicity, murdered Theoctistus, as prelude to overthrowing the regency in 856, and packing his mother and sisters off to a monastery. Inherited a relatively stable empire, and was an active military leader against the Arabs, personally piloting his troops in the field, while Bardas acted as a domestic reformer, particularly in the religious sphere. Sponsored Saints Cyril (C.S. Lewis) and Methodius (Reinhold Neibuhr) to bring the gospel to the Khazars in their own language, then invaded Bulgaria in order to keep their head of state within the eastern Christian fold, which effectively made the country a satellite of Byzantium. Liked to drunkenly roister through the streets in costume with his cronies. One of them was a Macedonian peasant of prodigious physical strength named Basil (Maxim Gorki) who became his trusted confidant and chamberlain. In order to have his mistress accessible, he had the former marry her. Their first two sons, the future Leo VI (Leo Tolstoy) and Stephen, a future patriarch, may have been his, while he also adopted Basil, to insure the familial connection. Basil, however, had his own designs on the throne, and manipulated him into thinking Bardas was similarly inclined. Gave him permission to murder his uncle, and crowned him co-emperor in 867. When Basil began to feel his own position threatened, he and a small group of cohorts crept into the emperor’s bedroom when he was lying in a drunken sleep following a banquet, and watched as his hands were cut off before a sword was run through his heart. Eventually reburied with honors by his son Leo in the imperial mausoleum after it had been placed in an out-of-the-way monastery immediately following his death. Little mourned at the time of his passing. The subject of numerous unflattering portrayals by contemporaries because of his inebriated character. Inner: Very physical, and an enthusiastic chariot racer to the point of obsession. Loved horses, and was most at home in the field, where his natural gladiator proclivities came to light. Had no real sense of money, although somehow his empire came together financially under him, through the auspices of others. Unsteady lifetime of being serially dominated by a string of much stronger personalities, despite his innate warrior nature, thanks to a weak will and a debilitating taste for both spirits and pleasure that blunted his ability to see the true nature of those most closely connected to him. Samson (12th to 11th cent. BZ) - Israelite judge and strongman. Outer: Parents were from the tribe of Dan, and unable to conceive, until they were visited by their deity disguised as an Angel who told them that they would give birth to a child would be a deliverer of their beleaguered nation as a Nazirite, or consecrated being who must maintain his purity, abstain from alcohol and never cut his hair. His father was skeptical, then frightened, but finally accepted that this was a direct message from on-high. Grew into a powerful young man in the foothills west of Jerusalem, and was made a judge over his people, before leaving his home territory in a desire to visit the cities of the Philistines. While there, he fell in love with Timnah, and wished to marry her, despite the objection of his parents, who did not realize that this, too, was part of their deity’s plan for him. While on his way to ask for his intended’s hand, he was attacked by an Asiatic lion, and manually ripped it apart through divine empowerment. Kept the confrontation a secret, and on his wedding day, saw bees had nested in the carcass and made honey. Ate some and gave some to his parents in celebration of this tasty token from higher powers. At his wedding feast, he proposed a riddle to his 30 Philistine groomsmen, “out of the eater, something to eat; out of the strong, something sweet,” promising fine linen and garments to whoever could solve it. When the disgruntled crew was unable to, they threatened his new wife, forcing her to beg the solution from him, which he gave her, and she promptly relayed it to the groomsmen. After they gave him the correct answer, he became enraged and killed them all, before leaving and discovering his wife had been given to another. In revenge, he attached torches to the tails of 300 foxes, who immolated the fields of the Philistines. In the angry wake of his action, he wound up slaughtering even more of them. Took refuge in a cave, and following further back-and-forths, he undid another thousand Philistines with the jawbone of an ass. More feats of strength ensued, as he turned his role of judge into an endless series of violent judgments, sentencing one and all who fall afoul of his sense of justice to death. During this time, he fell in love with another Philistine woman, Delilah (Gloria Trevi), who did not seem to share the same heartfelt feelings for him. Instead, she was induced via bribe by several Philistine rulers to discover the source of his strength. He fabricated it several times, before her persistence finally resulted in his admitting it was his hair which gave him his power, thereby breaking his Nazirite oath, causing his deity to abandon him. While he was asleep on her lap, she had a servant come and cut his seven locks, robbing him of his power. He was subsequently overcome and blinded, but instead of killing him, his enemies wished to further humiliate him after what he had done to so many of them. He was subsequently brought to a prison and made to grind grain, where his hair began to regrow. His captors ignored this hirsute renewal and took him to a temple to be present at a religious sacrifice to one of their most important deities. Leaning against its central pillars, he prayed that his strength might return, and it did, allowing him to bring down the temple, killing all the people within it, including himself. His body was recovered by his family, and he was buried near the tomb of his father to become a legendary figure of the ages, for both his strengths and weaknesses. Inner: Largely unable to integrate his female side and the vulnerabilities of his unconscious with his greater self, condemning him ultimately to fall prey to the persistent will of another, through his misguided love for her. Filled with a violent and vengeful sense of retribution as a judge who was finally judged wanting by the very deity who had first empowered him. Bench-pressing lifetime of literally losing sight of his calling before finding his faith again, as a deliberator whose harsh judgments ultimately sentenced him to be his own executioner.


Storyline: The nordic knockout follows her crypto-family members onto the silver screen, although forges a far more memorable career off of it in her careening relationships, and desire to stay forever young.

Britt Ekland (1942) - Swedish actress. Outer: Father was a successful Swedish retailer. Oldest of 4, with three younger brothers, one of them becoming a nurse. 5’2”, and large-eyed. Attended a drama school before joining a traveling theater group. Fluent in several languages, she launched her film career in Italy far more on her classic Scandinavian looks than any discernible talent, and quickly became the wife of comedic star Peter Sellers (Sacha Baron Cohen), in 1964, after he saw her picture in a newspaper. The latter suffered a heart attack in bed their wedding night, and she wound up appearing in two of his less memorable films. The duo produced actress Victoria Sellers, before divorcing in 1968, because she was unwilling to become a full-time wife in lieu of having a career. Took on a string of high-profile Hollywood A-list lovers afterwards, while her film career became secondary to her extra-curricular shenanigans, including having a son in 1973 with American record producer Lou Adler. Her most memorable role would be as a Bond bombshell in The Man with the Golden Gun the following year. Hooked up with rocker Rod Stewart in the mid-70s, and sang in French on one of his biggest hits, although their sexual incompatibility led to his having an affair, which ended the relationship. Following their highly-publicized break-up in 1977, she filed a palimony suit, claiming the relationship had vampired her career, although the charge was soon dismissed in court. Afterwards, the fare in which she appeared spiraled ever downward, as she expanded, or contracted, into TV and the stage. Became obsessed with young rock stars in the early 1980s, which culminated in 1984, when she wed Slim Jim Phantom, a musician nearly two decades her junior. One son from the union, which ended in 1992. Suffered osteoporosis later in life, and also became involved in Alzheimer awareness, after losing her mother to the dis/ease in 2005. In addition to an autobiography, “True Britt,” which was published in 1980, she was also the author of a beauty and fitness book in 1984, and remains a fitness disciple, after becoming one of the first celebrities to embrace pilates. Still obsessed with her looks into deep middle age, with collagen implants, and a “trout pout,” from them, as one of many limelighted figures unwilling to age naturally. Ultimately settled in Los Angeles, while remaining a world traveler. Inner: Candid, insecure and adventurous. Youth-obsessed, and unwilling to step out of the spotlight, seeing herself as an object of eternal interest. Lights, camera, action lifetime of switching milieus from royalty to tabloid fodder while opening herself up to both her physicality and sexuality, with her heart taking second place to her sense of perennial allure. Maria Feodorovna (Marie Sophie Frederikke Dagmar of Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glucksburg) (1847- 1928) - Danish tsarina of Russia. Outer: 2nd daughter of the future king of Denmark, who inherited the throne via his wife’s being the niece of an earlier predecessor. Younger sister of Alexandra (Princess Diana), who became queen of England. Her older brother became king of Greece, while a younger brother eventually succeeded their father. Her family line was relatively impoverished, until her sire ascended the throne in 1863. Engaged to the heir apparent of the Russian throne, Tsarevitch Nicholas (David Hasselhoff), only to see him die from TB in 1865, which devastated her, since she had already emotionally wed herself to Russia. Per his wish, she married the future tsar of Russia, Alexander III (Johnny Weissmuller) in 1866, in what would prove to be a close match. Converted from Lutheranism to the Russian Orthodox faith, while also Russifying her name to Maria Feodorovna. 4 sons and 2 daughters from the union, including her husband’s unfortunate successor, Nicholas II (Lex Barker). Learned both Russian and the culture of her adopted country, and was easily accepted by the court for her willingness to remold herself. Spent her time dealing with the domesticity of raising her royal brood, and attending social events, while almost never interfering in politics, save for her intense dislike of Germany for its annexing Danish territories. On the assassination of Alexander II (Steven Spielberg) in 1881, her husband ascended the throne, and much of the revolutionary ardor of Russia was forced underground, while the duo had to move outside St. Petersburg to Gatchina Palace, because of the constant threat of violent termination of their rule. Remained a well-loved figure to her adopted people during her spouse’s 12 year reign of orthodox suppression, which saw him eventually weaken and die in 1894. Completely distraught over his relatively premature exit, she also disapproved of her son Nicholas II’s match with the future Alexandra (Lana Turner). Threats on her own life receded in her new role as Dowager Empress, which she came to enjoy, although the Romanov family ended its 300 year grip on the throne of Russia in 1917, when the monarchy was overthrown by Bolshevik revolutionaries, a happenstance she blamed entirely on her daughter-in-law. Subsequently made her own escape westward from Russia, while denying to her dying day that her son and his family had been murdered. Did not leave the country until 1919, and then only reluctantly, making her way initially to London and her sister. Went into eventual exile in Copenhagen, joining numerous other Russian emigrées there, allowing her to play Dowager Empress for the rest of her life. Devastated once again by the death of her sister, Alexandra, in 1925, and three years afterwards, joined her. Nearly 80 years later, her remains were brought back to Russia, where she was interred next to her husband, per her wishes. Inner: Personable, domestic and genuinely well-loved by all who knew her. Loss-shrouded lifetime of enjoying the perks of power, then ever so reluctantly letting them go, as the wave of both his/story and her/story crashed over her, much to her denial and disbelief.


Storyline: The don’t touch that dial diva displays a fierce drive and exhibitionistic ardor in her ongoing desire to be loved and lusted after by one and all, while creating drama galore around her ongoing antics, be it in the pop or political sphere.

Gloria Trevi (Gloria de los Angeles Trevino Ruiz) (1968) - Mexican singer and actress. Outer: Mother was a former showgirl who supported the family as a dance teacher, father was domineering and rarely employed. 4 younger brothers. Raised in poverty in a violent atmosphere that often saw her go hungry. Began writing poetry by the age of 5, before appearing at a local dance theater at 7, and seeing applause as the balm she needed for her life. Her parents divorced when she was 10, and she continued to live with her abusive mother, who offered no support to her dreams of becoming an entertainer. Left home at the age of 13, despite her mother’s objections, and went to Mexico City, where she lived on the streets, singing on corners and at bus stations for change, while doing low level menial jobs. Earned a scholarship at a singing academy, and then hooked up with Sergio Andrade, a controlling manager. He put her into an all-girl musical group, Boquitas Pintadas (the Little Painted Mouths). When the group disbanded in 1988, he produced her first release. In 1989, the album, “Que Hago Aqui,” (What Am I Doing Here), was released, and 3 of its singles became the 3 top songs, turning her into an instant pop star. Showed an extremely aggressive stage persona, including pouring Coke down her crotch, and stripping and beating male audience members, which outraged many critics, but endeared her to her legion of fans for acting out their fantasies. Often undressed males from the audience, and appeared in provocative costumes, including a bandolier of condoms across her chest, causing her to be banned from Mexican TV. Her second album reached the Latino audience in the U.S., and her hit single “Pelo Suelto” (Loose Hair) became an anthem of freely expressed joy for her young followers in both countries. Became Mexico’s biggest rock star, and an icon for lower-class youth, as she announced she would someday be president of the country, while taking feminist stances, including pro-abortion. Dubbed the Mexican Madonna, as well as La Atrevida, the Bold One, while everything she touched, movies, calendars and TV specials, all turned to gold. Her manager Andrade, however, began collecting young girls and turning them into his personal harem, as well as turning them out as prostitutes. Her legend began crumbling in 1998, when it was revealed she and he and the young girls were all living a cultish existence in Spain. They fled the police as an international search was undertaken for them, on charges of rape, kidnapping, and corruption of a minor, and she was finally brought into custody in 2000, when she and Andrade were discovered in Brazil, along with several of his sexual acolytes. Once in an all-woman’s jail in Brazil, she conceived a baby, whose paternity remained secret, in an attempt to be set free, since Brazilian law has never extradited a mother whose child was born on Brazilian soil. Rumor had it she was impregnated by the donated sperm of one of Brazil’s most notorious gangsters, whom she chose because he was certain to be killed in prison, for raping the 3 year old daughter of a rival and therefore would never have a claim on her fortune. DNA testing, however, later showed that Andrade was the father. Eventually agreed to be extradited to Mexico at the end of 2002, and in 2004 was finally acquitted, on insufficient evidence. Came to the U.S. right afterwards to accept a Latin Music Fan award, and her lawyer and fiance, Armando Gomez was immediately arrested on charges of money smuggling, while she launched a Trevolution concert tour, as well as a CD and TV show to keep her highly entertaining name very much alive in the public eye, despite decidedly mixed reactions to all her antics. Inner: Passionate, strongly sexed, but curiously submissive to her manager, despite her public stance as totally unfettered. Que hago aqui lifetime of filling stadiums and grabbing headlines, while turning herself into a prisoner of her on-going inability to integrate herself around male energy, while remaining a freewoman in her inhibited expression of herself. Lupe Velez (Maria Guadalupe de Villalobos) (1908-1944) - Mexican actress and dancer. Outer: Educated in a San Antonio convent. Began her career dancing on the stage in Mexico City, before coming to Hollywood to do the same in a nightclub revue, with the intention of becoming an international star. Began her film career in 1926 doing comedy film shorts, then made her starring debut the following year playing opposite Douglas Fairbanks (Robert Downey, Jr.) in The Gaucho. Typecast as a tempestuous latina in subsequent features, she earned the sobriquet of ‘the Mexican Spitfire,’ and ultimately teamed up with Leon Errol in a comedy series under that name. Had a far more dramatic life off-screen. Hooked up with several big name stars, beginning with Fairbanks, then John Gilbert (Tom Selleck), Charlie Chaplin and boxer Jack Dempsey. After being rejected by Gary Cooper (Brad Pitt) following a tantrum-laced, draining affair, she married swimmer/actor Johnny Weissmuller in 1933 and the duo became a highly entertaining public couple, with their numerous quarrels and her outrageous behavior around him. Often flashed herself at parties, lifting her dress over her head to reveal nothing on underneath. The duo finally divorced in 1938, with Weissmuller bearing the scars of her raging passion on his body. Also the possessor of a charming singing voice. Returned to Mexico to try to revive her career, which she did in the film Nana in 1943, then came back to her home in Beverly Hills. Continually unlucky in love because of her passionate, possessive nature, she lowered her sights to handsome Hollywood hangers-on, while her screen career plummeted accordingly. When she discovered she was pregnant by one of them, she decided on doing herself in, rather than violate her Catholic tenets around abortion. Also heavily in debt at the time, with the realization that her limited talents could no longer support her. Committed suicide as a performance artist event, getting coiffed and made-up by her hairdresser and make-up man, then lay down in a room filled with flowers and candles, after she swallowed a bottle of Seconals. The pills, however, did not do it, and she wound up drowning with her head down in the toilet bowl, after retching up her intake of the night before and passing out, a fitting ending for a life dedicated to outre behavior. Inner: Fiery, irrepressible, totally uninhibited and emotionally unstable. Boxing aficionado, often at the fights, screaming and cheering for her favorites. Spitfire lifetime of allowing her tempestuous heart total reign over her over-the-edge emotionality before drowning in her own wretched excess. Marie-Luisa (1751-1819) - Spanish queen. Outer: From the Spanish House of Bourbon. Youngest of 3 children of Felipe, Duke of Parma (Wallace Shawn) and Louise-Elizabeth (Diane Keaton), daughter of the French king, Louis XV (Mikhail Gorbachev). While her father was escorting her to Spain to wed her paternal first cousin Carlos IV (Johnny Weissmuller), he suddenly died. Married Carlos in 1765, and thoroughly dominated him. His main interest was hunting, and he left affairs of state to her after he ascended to the Spanish throne in 1788, inheriting a relative stable country from his highly competent father, Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher). Although she had 14 children with her royal spouse, several were believed to have been fathered by her longtime lover, Manuel Godoy, who was her husband’s chief minister, and with whom she worked closely to control the state. Only half reached full adulthood, thanks probably to the consanguinity of the union, with Ferdinand VII, her eldest son, eventually succeeding to the throne. Seen as both vicious and coarse by her contemporary courtiers, although her relationship with Godoy, which totally empowered him, was viewed favorably by her husband, who feared, above all else, the excesses of the French Revolution. The subject of several wide-eyed portraits by Francisco Goya (Diego Rivera). Poor decision-making, as well as the manipulations of her son, Ferdinand, eventually caused her and her husband to abdicate in 1808. When Napoleon installed his brother on the throne, she and her spouse were both taken to France as prisoners. Spent the rest of their lives in exile, first in France, and then, after the fall of Napoleon, in Italy, with both dying within 2 and 1/2 weeks of each other. Inner: Dissolute and domineering, with a penchant for intrigue, and an easily manipulative husband at her behest. Royal pain lifetime of being given the opportunity of flexing her love of centerstage power, before an inevitable fall in her ongoing love of manic roller-coaster rides. Eudokia Ingerina (c840-c842) - Byzantine mistress and empress. Outer: Father was a guard in the service of the Byzantine emperor. Mother was a distant relative of the ruling house, and her family was iconclastic. Despite the stern disapproval of the empress, she became the secret mistress of her son, the future Michael III (Johnny Weismuller). Because of the potential scandal, he married her to his bodyguard Basil (Maxim Gorki), who would later usurp the throne from him, while he continued his relationship with her, giving his own sister as a mistress in exchange. Gave birth to a son, Leo (Leo Tolstoy), who would eventually inherit the throne on Basil’s death, as well as another son, while both would be considered Basil’s children. Basil was promoted to co-emperor as Basil I in 867, while questioning the paternity of her issue. Michael would be murdered at the same time, so that her four other children, three daughters and a son, Alexander (Suge Knight), who ultimate became emperor, did not have their paternity questioned. Continued her wanton ways, becoming involved with another man a decade into Basil’s reign, only to see her lover made into a monk, on her husband discovering their affair. After selecting a wife for her son, Leo, and feeling her duty was done, she died shortly afterwards. Inner: Strong-willed and seductive, with a surety around the intricacies of the halls of power, allowing her to control her destiny during a time when women had little real say in their lives. Manipulative lifetime of holding her own in the byzantine corridors of Byzantium, as wife, mistress and mother of a quartet of emperors. Delilah (12th to 11th cent. BZ) - Philistine temptress. Outer: Nothing is known of her origins other than she might have been from a valley that separated the land of the Philistines from the land of the Israelites, so that she is a figure of pure conjecture. Some make her a prostitute, others merely a greedy manipulative woman, who is presumed to be a Philistine. The Hebrew judge and strongman Samson (Johnny Weismuller) fell in love with her, although she did not seem to have reciprocal feelings for him. She was subsequently induced by a bribe of 1100 pieces of silver paid by each of five Philistine rulers to find the source of his strength. Once the two cohabited, he gave her several false stories involving being bound, which she then tried when he was asleep, although he easily broke the various bonds when he awakened. Her persistence eventually made him confess that if his long locks were shorn, he would lose his power, thereby breaking his vows as a deliverer, and leaving him open and vulnerable. Got a servant to shave his seven locks off, and his strength departed him, after which he was captured and blinded by the Philistines. There is no record of what happens to her afterwards nor any reason given why she herself did not shear him, but gave the task to another, save for a desire on the part of the chroniclers of the story to not give her the full grace of her power. Inner: In some versions, her name is a wordplay on the Hebrew ‘layla’ or night, who blots out the power of Samson, ‘the sun’. Viewed by many according to their prejudices against women, as everything from a harlot to a monumentally greedy manipulator. Archetypal lifetime of serving as a castrating siren for the ages, with little attempt made to plumb her psychological depths or see her as anything other than yet another in a long line of devious females in the heavily prejudiced patriarchal annals of the Old Testament.


Storyline: The well-watched bay watcher uses his physicality to excellent advantage, although harbors more than a passing desire for self-destruction unseen in his sunny exterior, as part of a crypto-brotherhood of Tarzans descended from frustrating thrones.

David Hasselhoff (David Michael Hasselhoff) (1952) - American actor, singer, producer and entrepreneur. Outer: Of German descent. Father was a business executive. The second of four children with three sisters. Originally quite shy as a child, although he discovered once he was on stage, he was a changed personality. Began dreaming of a musical career on Broadway, and studied at several colleges before getting a degree in theater arts,\ at the California Institute of the Arts in Los Angles. Got his first big break in the soap, “The Young and the Restless,” in his early 20s, playing a doctor for six seasons, and television would become his mainstay afterwards. 6’4”, handsome and well-built. His next hit would be “Knight Rider,” beginning in 1982, which would give him global cachet, and help him launch his singing career in Europe, where he had a number one hit in Germany in 1989 with “Looking for Freedom.” Continued issuing albums and giving concerts afterwards, although fared far better overseas than in America with his singing efforts. Married actress Catherine Hickland in 1984, divorced 5 years later. The same year he starred in “Baywatch” as lifeguard Mitch Buchannon, although it was canceled after one season. With partners, he acquired the rights to the show, and it was revived in 1991 to become an international sensation as a paean to toned American bodies that would be the world’s number one show for a goodly number of years, with a viewership of one billion in 140 countries, and, for many Asians, in particular, their primary fantasy image of the United States. In 1989, he married actress Pamela Bach, two daughters from the union, with whom he is extremely close. including actress Hayley, which ended in acrimonious divorce in 2006, and his gaining primary custody over his daughters, with whom he is extremely close. Became a hero to many Germans in 1989 by performing his song “Looking for Freedom” atop the Berlin Wall, which became a theme for German reunificationIn 2002, he checked into the Betty Ford Clinic for alcoholism, and would continually be bedeviled by drink throughout the decade. Spent four years as a judge on the show, “America’s Got Talent,” until his off-screen behavioral problems dictated replacing him. Severed a tendon in his arm in an odd shaving accident, as prelude to a home video showing him shirtless in a drunken stupor trying to negotiate a cheeseburger while on the floor. Shot by his daughter Taylor Ann in 2007, it was a well-publicized attempt to stop his self-destructive behavior. Rushed to the hospital two years later because of alcohol poisoning, and then did two repeat performances of saidsame, while his publicists frantically tried to spin his self-destructive behavior because of their potential harm to the various projects in which he is involved. Despite his misadventures and problems, able to laugh at himself, while trying to integrate a sunny exterior with a hidden lunar side. Established a charity, “Race For Life,” to work with terminally ill and handicapped children, and also penned his autobiography, “Making Waves,” in 2006. Had his reality show, “The Hasselhoffs” yanked after only two episodes in 2010 due to low ratings in his ongoing dive from public interest, despite his efforts to the contrary. A futher stab at British TV the following year, with “Britain’s Got Talent,” also saw the show plummet following his debut on it, although he wound up picking up a Welsh girlfriend, Hayley Roberts, some three decades his junior, in the process. Continued his German activism in 2013 by trying the save the last of the Berlin Wall from being razed by property developers. In 2015, he launched the mockumentary TV series, “Hoff the Record,” playing an exaggerated fictionalized version of himself, which ran for a season. and since then has done video shorts and mostly small screen work. Has a net worth of more than $120 million. Inner: Athletic, outdoorsy, open and friendly, albeit with a hidden dark-side as well. Guarded life lifetime of great success in a number of arenas, and yet, secret frustrations over his failure to win mass American plaudits for his singing, in his ongoing need to be well-loved for everything he does. Elmo Lincoln (Otto Elmo Linkenhelt) (1889-1952) - American actor and businessman. Outer: Of German descent. From a middle-class family and one of 7 children. Grandfather had been a marshal. A prankster with a sense of adventure, he headed for Hollywood as soon as he finished school. 5’11” and a beefy 220+ lbs., with a prominent 52’ chest. Worked as an Arkansas peace officer, then returned to California as a stevedore, where he was discovered by legendary director D.W. Griffith (Alfonso Cuaron), who changed his name to Elmo Lincoln and cast him in The Battle of Elderbush in 1913. Thanks to his manly physique, he got roles in two of Griffith’s subsequent epic albeit intolerant masterpieces, Birth of a Nation and Intolerance. Entered Hollywood lore in 1918 when he replaced the first Tarzan, who had just been called up to serve in WW I, and enjoyed his one and only box office sensation, Tarzan of the Apes, one of the first films to earn $1 million, appearing thrice in the role, including am equally successful 1921 serial, despite the disapproval of the character’s creator, Edgar Rice Burroughs (Joss Whedon), who found him far too fleshy. Afraid of heights, and unskilled as an actor, he, nevertheless, impressed his physique on a horde of female fans, and enjoyed a brief run in the spotlight. By the advent of talkies, he was out of films and used the money he earned by investing in a Mexican silver mine, which went broke. In the interim he went into the salvage business in Salt Lake City, although the lure of films never left him. Married Ida Lee Tanchick in the mid-1930s, later divorced. His second wife was Sadie Whited. Returned to Hollywood in the late 1930s, and worked mostly as an extra and doing bits, while appearing in two Tarzan films in the 1940s. Also featured with the Seal Brothers Circus under the billing of “The Original Tarzan.” Died of a heart attack, while he was coughing. Inner: Highly physical and good-natured, with a genuine desire to be in the spotlight, once he had ultimately found it. Me Tarzan lifetime of using his physicality to full advantage in gaining access to a sphere that he would continue to explore in more talented fashion, while trading in his earlier crypto-crown for a brief kingship of the jungle, just as his fellow secret family members would do, after him. Tsarevich Nicholai Alexandrovich (1843-1865) - Russian heir to the throne. Outer: Eldest son of Alexander II (Steven Spielberg) before he became tsar. Mother (Norma Shearer) had been a German princess. Oldest of 8 including the future Alexander III (Johnny Weismuller). Nicknamed Nixa as a child. When he was 12, his father succeeded his grandfather Nicholas I (Master P) as tsar of Russia. Engaged to Princess Marie Sophia of Denmark (Britt Ekland), when he was 21. While touring western Europe, he was misdiagnosed with rheumatism, when he was actually suffering from TB, despite an outward appearance of being robust. Continued his traveling, ignoring his weakened condition, until his health deteriorated to the point of dying. On his deathbed, he passed his fiancee on to his brother, expressing the desire she replace him in her affections. His mother never fully recovered from his loss. Inner: Sip of vodka lifetime of rejecting a role his/story had thrust upon him, in order to return in far less grandiose fashion, in the crypto-familial role of Tarzan, as emblem of a need to show himself as a strong-bodied reflection of secret rule. Constantine VI (771-797) - Byzantine Basileus. Outer: Only child of the empress Irene (Vilma Banky), of Athenian origin and the Byzantine Basileus Leo IV (Samuel Goldwyn). When his father died in 780, under somewhat suspicious circumstances, his highly ambitious mother became regent, showing little interest in sharing rule with him, as she reversed her husband’s iconoclastic rule, in which all relics and icons were banned, to one where they were once more venerated. A revolt against her ensued within six weeks of their joint rule, although it was put down, and the officers, including his uncle Nicephorus and officials involved, were tonsured and banished, while his mother’s supporters took their place. Nicephorus and his four brothers were then made priests, which disqualified them from rule. His mother selected a daughter of the western emperor Charlemagne (Napoleon Bonaparte) for him in order to unite the empires, although the union never happened. Eunuchs took leading roles in their administration, contra to the usual aristocratic officials, while one, Stauracius, proved quite disastrous in the field against the Arabs, causing the empire to pay huge tributes, although fared better against the Slavs. Even though it was customary for a young emperor to take the reins at 16, when he reached his majority, the empress showed no inclination of releasing her grip on power. She broke off his previous engagement, and selected another bride for him, via a bride-show, a beauty pageant of sorts that had become a spousal selection process of the empire. The selectee, Maria of Amnia, was granddaughter of an Armenian magnate, although he had no interest in her. Two daughters from the union, one of whom would marry a successor, Michael II (Master P). Military losses weakened his mother’s position, and when he made a move against her to replace Stauracius, he was thwarted by an earthquake, which gave the former’s minions time to react, and his backers were tonsured and exiled, while he was imprisoned for several days. A refusal in 790 by the army to swear absolute loyalty to the empress, however, led to his acclamation as emperor. Immediately solidified his own position with his own oath-taking, while exiling his mother’s various eunuchs and confining her to her palace, although she was not deposed. Two years later, for some unknown reason, he had her recalled and made co-ruler again, with her title restored. Had threatening relatives blinded, while his mother continued to manipulate events to place him in a vulnerable light, particularly in the eyes of the army. A revolt by the Armenians was made to look like he was disloyal and unjust, which lost him much of his power base, and forced him to rely on his mother’s faction. Sent his wife to a convent, while taking on a mistress, Theodote, a lady-in-waiting of his mother’s, whom he wished to wed, in order to produce a male heir. His mother probably encouraged the matrimonial perfidy, as he crowed his inamorata as Augusta, which he had never done with his wife. The duo wed, much to the Church’s displeasure, and produced a baby son who died as an infant. His mother now viciously plotted his overthrow, and had him seized and confined, and then blinded in such manner as to cause his death, much to the horror of the empire. Her solo reign was brought to a halt several years later, although she was allowed to die peacefully, and, despite all her grotesque manipulations, ultimately was canonized for restoring relic veneration. Inner: Weak-willed, despite a strong body, and easily dominated by others, much as his father had been. Lights out lifetime of being overwhelmed by a power-hungry mother whose love of stage center far superseded her feelings for him.


Storyline: The charming crypto-queen is ineluctably drawn down through time to the many shades of power for both the better and the worse for herself, thanks to an active, aggressive intelligence not always welcomed in all circles.

Dakota Johnson(1989) - American actress and model. Outer: Mother was actress Melanie Griffith, who married her father, actor Don Johnson twice, and she was the product of their second go-round, which ended like the first one, with divorce. Had numerous half-siblings, through her parents’ multiple marriages. Made her film debut as a child in 1999 in Crazy in Alabama, in which she and a half-sister played the daughters of her real-life mother. The film was directed by her step-father, Antonio Banderas, although it was not well-received. Went back to school, per her parents’ wishes, before committing herself to a show business career. 5’7”, natural brunette with blue eyes. Voted Miss Golden Globe in 2006, a title her mother had won thirty years earlier. Became a model afterwards, while also doing a stint in rehab because of issues with her parents, and having difficulty dealing with her powerful emotionality, which was feeding into a lack of sense of self-understanding. Appeared in her first hit in 2010 in a supporting role in The Social Network, and quickly found herself in demand with a score of credits over the next several years. Had a one-season TV run on “Ben and Kate,” before resuming her film career, and scored big in 2015 with the role of Anastasia Steele in the adaptation of the erotic novel Fifty Shades of Gray, a role coveted by many of her peers, which she won through forceful readings, and her willingness to put herself on degraded display in the pursuit of superstardom. True to form, the film proved to be a blockbuster, while her ability to inject life and panache into a one-dimensional character, has made her an extremely hot property. Inner: Knew from an early age that acting was her life course Uninhibited and strongly emotional, with the desire to use her inner self as a means of bringing stories of all sorts to life. Animal rights activist, and still in the process of forming her public persona. Big screen lifetime of continuing her pursuit of the craft of acting, after a checkered earlier run of go-rounds, of showing herself in various power arenas, as a woman to be reckoned with. Faye Emerson (1917-1983) - American actress and TV hostess. Outer: Father was a rancher and court stenographer. Grew up in Texas and Illinois, before her family settled in California. In her early teens, her parents divorced and she went to live with her mother and newly minted stepfather in San Diego, before being placed in a convent boarding school. Went to San Diego State afterwards, where she became interested in acting. Performed in several Community Players productions, beginning in 1935 as her apprenticeship. 5’4”, eventually with dyed blonde hair pulled back in a trademark bun, accentuating her handsome face. In 1938, she married William Crawford, a former naval aviator turned car dealer, one son from the union, which floundered because of her career, and ended in 1942. Began her professional life doing ‘B’ films in the 1940s, with a bit part in The Nurse’s Secret in 1941, although never really established herself in the public eye on the large screen. In 1943, she wed Elliott Roosevelt, the son of the president, FDR, who was an author and war hero, and married at the time they met. On his divorce, the duo wed in 1944. Proved to be a popular figure in the White House, while retiring from the screen to focus on her marriage, which took her to NYC, where she enmeshed herself in the city’s social dynamic. No children from the union, which played out well before their official divorce in 1950. Made a suicide attempt two years earlier, slitting her wrists over her floundering marriage, then returned to show business with her Broadway debut in “The Play’s the Thing.” Finally found her true medium on TV’s small screen, to become one of its earliest stars, mixing glamor with memorable presence. Began in 1948 by acting in a variety of anthology series, and in 1950 was given her own eponymous show, a fifteen minute interview program, which only lasted one season, but was in a much watched time slot following the CBS Evening News. Took full advantage of the new medium with low-cut evening gowns, mixing a keen intelligence with obvious sex appeal and a vivacious beauty. Followed it up with a half-hour variety show, then made numerous quiz show appearances, becoming a full-time panelist on “I’ve Got a Secret” from 1952 to 1958. Appeared frequently on other people’s entertainments, so much so, that the annual TV award, the Emmy, was probably named after her. Usually dressed in low cut evening gowns to make her a glamorous guest in America’s living rooms of the 1950s, as “The First Lady of Television.” In 1951, she wed band leader Skitch Henderson, who proved an inconstant scandal-rid mate, leading to her third and final divorce in 1957, after earlier doing a TV show together. An active and highly public Democrat as well as deeply involved in industry politics, she was ultimately seen as emasculating and far too opinionated for her gender. Her popularity ebbed by the late 1950s, as did her small screen presence, limiting her to two appearances in the early 1960s. Her career now over, she moved to Spain in 1963, and spent the latter part of her life on the island of Majorca, living with Anne Roosevelt, the divorced first wife of her second husband’s brother. Died of stomach cancer, and was buried on Majorca. Inner: Chic and extremely fashionable, with the ability to mix intelligence with glamour and strong sex appeal. Strong feminist, feeling women should be involved in the political theater of TV. Large personality on the small screen lifetime of bringing her unusual presence to early TV, before finding herself persona non grata because of an acute intelligence and aggressive political sense not acceptable to the easily-bruised male ego of the pre-1960s era. Angelica van Buren (Sarah Angelica Singleton) (1818-1877) - American first lady. Outer: From a wealthy plantation owning family, with former first lady Dolley Madison (Michelle Bernard) a cousin. The youngest of four, with three older brothers. Enjoyed a privileged upbringing, including an education at a private seminary in Philadelphia. Through the efforts of her famous cousin, she met and then married Abraham van Buren (Elliot Roosevelt), the eldest of four sons of Pres. Martin van Buren (FDR), who was totally captivated by her. The latter was a widower when he entered the White House, and she went on to play the role of First Lady for him, for the first two years of his presidency, fulfilling her hostess duties with both grace and style. Her teas and balls proved a great favorite with the women of Washington, while she was also able to handle prickly diplomatic characters. Brought both style and etiquette to the White House, while overseeing mostly small, intimate dinners. At the same time, she redecorated the presidential mansion, taking great care not to be extravagant because the country was mired in a depression at the time. In 1840, she gave birth to a daughter who died later that year. After she left the White House, the couple had three sons, with the eldest dying in infancy. Eventually settled in NYC, where she was known for her charitable work. Lost her husband in 1873, and died four years later. Ultimately buried in NY. Inner: Charming, gracious, giving and a natural hostess, with the ability to put everyone around her at ease. Had European tastes, which would prove fodder for critics of her father-in-law, and help feed into the view he was an out-of-touch elitist, which led to only one term at the helm of the country. Well-received lifetime of bringing her grace and magnetism to a central American power stage, with only the infant deaths of her first two progeny marring an otherwise unblemished go-round. Maria Amalia of Saxony (Maria Amalia Christina Franziska Xaveria Flora Walburga) (1724-1760) - German queen of Naples, Sicily and Spain. Outer: From the House of Wettin, a Northern European dynasty that ultimately fed into the English throne. Father was Augustus III of Poland, the Elector of Saxony. Mother was Maria Josepha of Austria, daughter of the HRE Joseph I (David Geffen). Born in a royal palace, she was one of 15 children, many of whom would bear European crowns. Grew up at the courts of Dresden and Warsaw, and received a proper education for young noblewomen of the time. In 1737, she was wed to the future Carlos III (Ashton Kutcher) of Spain, who was king of Naples and Sicily at the time, although she was not her mother-in-law Elizabeth Farnese’s (Lucille Ball) first choice. Met him for the first time a month after their proxy marriage, and the duo proved a loving couple, despite being the product of an arrangement. 6 sons and 6 daughters from the close union, with seven surviving into adulthood, and the rest dying in infancy or early childhood. Their sixth child and eldest son, Felipe, was an imbecile, drooler and molester, which occasioned his removal to Naples, where he died of smallpox at the age of 30, after having been barred from the succession. Actively participated in state affairs as queen consort, and had great influence at court, easily out-manipulating those nobles she disliked, thanks to being given a seat in the council of state as her husband’s closest adviser, once she had produced a suitable heir. Well-liked and respected as a monarch, and very active in promoting her spouse’s various construction projects, including palaces and a theater, where opera was staged. When her husband acceded to the Spanish throne in 1759, she left for Spain with him to became queen consort, although took an immediate dislike to the relative backwardness of Madrid. Forced her mother-in-law to leave the court, while making plaint of everything Spanish, including the food, the language and the climate, while viewing Spaniards as ignorant and uncultured. Extremely depressed and given to bouts of hysteria over the change, she lost the will to live and died the following year from tuberculosis. Buried in the royal crypt at Madrid’s main palace. In honor of her memory, her husband did not marry again. Inner: Unafraid of playing with power at the highest levels, and not shy in the least about expressing her opinions on political matters. Skilled horsewoman, accompanying her husband on hunts, and very much the adored and adoring wife, knowing how to keep her regal mate continually entranced with her. Royal lifetime of proving to be quite active politically, during a time when queens, for the most part, were providers of heirs and little more.



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